LONELINESS WHY?

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by PoiemaDei on January 9, 2009 at 8:49pm

Tina, you have expressed here a sincere feeling many singles experience. It has stirred me to write on this and there is much I need to bring out. So bear with me.

Loneliness is not just a passing emotion but a felt personal need. Remember the purpose God gave in creating Eve for Adam was that it was not good for a man to be alone.

However, many who are married will admit that having a spouse may not always be the actual cure for loneliness. Loneliness is actually filled by companionship. It is no doubt what God meant Adam needed - a help meet for him - one who fitted as his helper. A helper in that case meant more than assisting in work, vocation, profession, and so on.

Some who are married have found this helper in their spouses; some have not. It's not enough to have a bed-partner, home maker, or bread-winner. There is that real need that a true companion meets. A true help-meet complememnts you in a personal way. And such a person in your life banishes loneliness.

Why have I said all this? It is to say to you and all singles with similar disappointments like you share that loneliness is not necessarily cured by finding a spouse. There are many lonely spouses out there. It is society that has shaped our minds into thinking that marriage is the essential goal for every man and woman, as well as the only means of avoiding loneliness.

But Jesus acknowledged that to be single or a eunuch is a wholesome way of life which, of course, not every one can apreciate, but those for whom it is meant. "His disciples said to Him, 'If such is the case of the man with his wife, it is better not to marry.' But He said to them, 'All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom it has been given: For there are eunuchs who were born thus from their mother's womb, and there are eunuchs who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of heaven's sake. He who is able to accept it, let him accept it'" (Matthew 19:10-12).

So, one's loneliness is a need, as God points out, for a help meet for him or her. Someone who fits into another's personal life as a real support and comfort. Marriage was designed by God to provide this help for some people. However, in some instances (unfortunately today in many instances), it has failed to do so. For those, who have not married, it may well be they escaped the disappointment of being lonely spouses.

Nonetheless, Jesus Christ admits that there are those to whom it has been given or designed by God to be eunuchs or singles. It is my opinion that such people, including disappointed lonely spouses, who are Christians, can find their loneliness well-taken care of by the great Helper, a true Companion, our Lord Jesus Christ. He can meet fully that need of loneliness and bring a true sense of contentment.

We read in Hebrews 13:5-6: "Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For He Himself has said, 'I will never leave you nor forsake you.' So we may boldly say: 'The Lord is my Helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?'"

Jesus Christ is one who can truly be a help meet for every Christian human being, not only in our spirituality but also in our humanity, having experienced our humanity in all its virtues and weaknesses.

So, Tina, and all of you lonely ones, I pray, if it be the Lord's will for you, that you find a human spouse meet for you and able to provide you true companionship and take away your loneliness. At the same time, be assured that, if the Lord made you to be single, the Lord is able to provide or make Himself be that Help meet for you and give you a profound sense of companionship in a manner no human spouse can. You will find once that is settled, your communion with the Lord will be enriched and fullfilling. Moreover, you will be happily interacting out there socially, if you are the type for that, making friends and ministering to others with the Lord in your life. Loneliness would vanish.

Permalink Reply by empress on January 9, 2009 at 9:34pm

I ask the same question Everyday. I know its hard I deal with loneliness to but what I do is try to meet new people I know you can do it tina I believe in you dont give up sister Peace and love

Permalink Reply by Tina on January 10, 2009 at 4:27pm

Thank you Rick.



Tina

Permalink Reply by Tina on January 10, 2009 at 4:29pm

Thank you Ron.



Tina

Permalink Reply by Tina on January 10, 2009 at 4:30pm

Many thanks empress.



Tina

Permalink Reply by sabrina spears on January 11, 2009 at 9:56am

MY DEAR SISTER, YOU DO HAVE A HUSBAND AND HIS NAME IS JESUS CHRIST. I'M HERE FOR YOU IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO TALK TO. I TOO HAVE CRYING SPELLS AND I'M IN A RELATIONSHIP. SO DON'T BE DISCOURAGE. TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS YOU.

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Permalink Reply by Tina on January 11, 2009 at 10:05am

Dear Sabrina, Thank you so much for your kind and true word's. Also thank you for the graphic's you left for me. I hope we can be friends. God bless you.





Tina

Permalink Reply by RoxChelseaGilmore on February 28, 2009 at 1:57am

I feel just like you Last night I was so lonely because it was my friend`s birthday last night and I wanted to celebrate her birthday with her but she decided to celebrate it with hr boyfriend and I was so sad and lonely because she cheers me up when I am sad or lonley

Permalink Reply by deedee310 on March 3, 2009 at 5:08pm

I can understand how you feel, I'll be thirty years old in a few days and I"m so lonely and I want to be married too. My fear is that I'll never get married and find someone to share my life with. There are so many women in the world that are in the same boat as you and I. It seems as though most men are taken period. My days and nights are so horrible just like yours, I feel sad inside all the time. I often ask God why...... All I want is someone to share my life with, I dont ask to be rich, famous or none of that, I just want to share my life and love with someone. I pray about it all the time and I'm not going to quit praying about it. I"m going to pray about it around the clock, eventually God will get tired of my prayers and grant my hearts desires. I understand your pain...

Permalink Reply by Louisa on March 6, 2009 at 7:50am

Hello Tina
I really share what you feel. First I hope you get some help with how you feel from a professional....maybe medication is needed to help you. I know it doesn't make the loneliness go away...but it may help to take the edge off.
I would like to share my feelings and situation with you......
I am a divorced lady of 52, I have 2 beautifull children. Unfortunatley my eldest son took his own life 2 years ago this October. My partner of 8 years left me,and i have since been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). I am very lonley deppressed and at times i feel like giving up....it is a real struggle.
I gave my life to God some years ago....went and did my own thing,but deep inside i knew God was with me.
I believe that God has his plans for all of us, and that whatever comes our way it makes us stronger in the faith of the Lord.
Never give up, my faith is what keeps me going. I will offer my prayers for you.
Take care
Love Louisa

Permalink Reply by david winkleman on April 1, 2009 at 6:00am

Tina I know exactly how you feel...I am the same way all my life...
Check out my site http://www.davidwinklemanfoundation.com
Perhaps you will find a little something to help you along...
This is my solution for helping me...and others for God