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To Divorce or Not??

Hello. I am a 28YO Female with 2 kids (2,4). I am currently separated from my husband and pretty set on getting a divorce. I am at my wits end. I have tried all that I can do. I am in therapy, we have been to 3 counselors. I am humbling myself day by day. I have sacrificed to save our marriage. I ended a career in the US Navy, I prayed, and prayed until I lost my daily life balance. I fell into depression. I didn't know what else to do. I would have still been there if we didn't get evicted from our apartment. I just thought to myself...there is no way that God would treat his bride like this so why should I stand for it. My husband has really been selfish and stead fast in living the "single life" married. I am not saying that God will not change him but he is not willing right now.
I just need prayer. I started therapy and it feels like I am starting all over again. I know that I need patience but it hurts all over. I feel like if I do move on God will be disappointed and if I stay I would be miserable trying to make it work. Please pray for me...

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Permalink Reply by renee1976 on January 3, 2009 at 7:06am

Well the police told me that someone at this saw him with another cellphone and he was apparently talking to to woman in New Jersey, or in our home town. This info has really tore me up inside. I have never been with anyone but my husband. I dont understand how he could just pick someone else. Pluse i believe he does have a gambling problem since he always runs to the casinos. But he only has 600.00 and that will not last long. he has been gone for 8 days now. My little girls really miss thier daddy and so do i. But i cant keep living my life worrying if he is going to leave again. I have tried everything. I pray all night. I am not getting any sleep. he has really tore me up. I take my wedding vows with my whole heart good time bad times richer poorer sickness and in health. I keep saying not he has a sickness and he needs help. when will god answer my pray? I know god is walking beside me but i still hurt. me and my husband have been together for 8 1/2 years that is a long time. my husband took not clothes with his just his medcine. not a picture of the girls. I have filed a missing person report on him so if he get pulled over the police will know. I dont know how I am going to be able to work with all this onmy mind. i go back to work wednesday. i miss my husband so much the way he would hold my hand, hug me inthe morning, just hearing his voice. he is my best friend.

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Permalink Reply by ~Barbara~ on January 3, 2009 at 12:11pm

My sister..I can honestly say that I truly understand and sympathize with you on this matter. Your last sentence struck a chord for me in my heart. "I miss my husband, the way he would hold my hand, hug me and hear his voice" Do you know that sometimes when we go through trials and test, we really see how much we need God to lean on. If you hold true to your vows you have no where else to turn but to God's rest.
Some turn to another man, shopping, self-pity which turns into depression, drinking to fill that void. I can say that the only thing that is going to fill your void is an intimate relationship with GOD!!!
Once you become a child of God he gives us a deposit of the Holy Spirit...so all that you need and is longing for is already deposited in you and waiting on your call....Turn to God...Ask and pray for His peace, rest, and strength to get you through this. You need his guidance in this matter. No one on earth it as wise or more intelligent then God himself...No one on earth knows what God has in store for your marriage...
I went everywhere trying to search for answers until I was meditating in the word and realized what I was doing...Not trusting God's word...Ask him and he will guide you through every inch of your walk through this matter...Cast all your cares unto him and enter into his rest.
Matthew 11:28-30 is what really helped me to enter into God's rest..."Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and my burden is light."
So...all that I really am trying to say is...God knows your situation..He is omnipresent..which means that He is everywhere and all knowing about everything,everybody, every situation. Lean not to man or your own understanding..but to God...so that you can discern what is right for your marriage. Also for you to be able what to receive in your heart and what to cast out. Our biggest battle is not men advice but our flesh....I am here if you need to talk but your best conversation will be with God through his words...
He wants you to rejoice (re-join your joy) and preserver .....When you are weak that is when you are strong....Be encouraged...

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Permalink Reply by renee1976 on January 3, 2009 at 6:25pm

well my husband emailed me and told me he is really depressed. he still did not tell me where he is. he said he needs help and he said he knows i love him and he loves me and the girls very much. i am just hoping that he calls or emails me again. or maybe he is on his way home. keep me and him in your prayers.

To Divorce or Not??

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