All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
struggle with porn
I am having a hard time wanting to get rid of porn out of my life, I have let God get rid of it for me but find myself turning to it still, it hurts my girlfriend very much, please pray that i will find strength in Christ to battle my own desires of the flesh. Peace and love from your brother in Christ Ben Smith
Views: 400
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Jewell Massey on
-
Ben, admitting your struggle if a beginning to the end. I just read this morning that this can come from a generational situation. You did let God get rid of it for you, but there could be just one thing that is still holding you in bondage to the porn. Have your pastor or someone close that is familiar with the teaching of generational curses to talk with you and pray for everything that is holding you back to be released. The devil does not want you to be free and will try with all his might to bring it back continually in your life.
God will release this enemy from every coming back into your life. Blessings to you.
-
Permalink Reply by AAG Netguy on
-
Ben,
I’m writing to you as brother in the Lord and a fellow soldier in the battle against lust and sexual immorality. I want you to know you are not alone in the battle and as the Scriptures say, “No temptation has seized you except what is common to man…” (I Corinthians 10:13). As you know, the enemy is waging war against us and he is doing his utmost to destroy us. I also want you to know that it is possible to have victory over lust, sexual immorality, pornography and masturbation, on a day-to-day basis so don’t give up. God is for you in this battle, not against you (Romans 8:31).
I’m not going to cite a lot of verses from Bible to you on the need to avoid lust and immorality; I imagine you are well acquainted with them and you probably feel a huge sense of guilt, shame and condemnation already. That is the purpose of God’s Law – like a mirror, it shows us how unclean we really are and how badly we need God to cleanse us and restore us. Believe it or not, like the father in the story of the prodigal son, God is waiting for us to return to Him and confess our sin so he can run to us, clean us up, restore us to our rightful place, and love on us! Amazing isn’t it? God is not your enemy in this battle.
Later, I’ll share some practical tips to help you in the battle, but first, I want to let you know about some big-picture truths that may help you and every believer to start walking in freedom and help other brothers (or sisters) in the struggle.
1. Realize that you are free! It may not feel like it now (because you’ve formed some stubborn bad habits), but because you’ve been purchased by Jesus you are indeed free from sin. You are not trapped. You are not a slave to sin any longer. You can walk in freedom. But it is a minute-by-minute choice to walk with Jesus or return to slavery. Remember Romans 6:14: “For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace.” Satan will tell you that you are hopeless, trapped, and a horrible disgrace of a Christian and you will always be that way. Recognize that for the lie it is.
Because you know Jesus, God says in the Bible that you are free to live a life of righteousness, brother! It is a real choice you can make right now. Old sinful habit patterns often take time to change, but from this moment on, you are under no obligation to follow them. We are not sinless, but by God’s grace we’ll start making better choices and sin less and less.
2. God gave you sexual desires! God created sex and in his eyes, it is holy, righteous, and good within the context of marriage. Therefore, the desire for sex is not wrong or evil in itself. Don’t let Satan heap guilt upon you for having these desires. On the other hand, the definition of the word “lust” in the original language means an over-desire, an excessive or obsessive desire for something. We need to ask ourselves, “Why do I have this excessive desire for sex? What is it doing for me? What is the empty spot in my soul or hole in my heart am I trying to fill with pornography?”
3. Only God can fill the emptiness! Much advice on the battle against lust and immorality falls short because it concentrates on techniques to manage sin. These things all have their place, but they fundamentally miss the point. Sexual immorality is an issue of the heart and when the heart is engaged, all rational thought goes out the window. Just ask any guy in love. Therefore, consider that when we are indulging in lust, pornography or other sexually immoral thoughts or practices, what we are actually seeking for deep down is God!
God created empty places in us so He could fill them. They cannot be permanently satisfied by any means other than God. At the core of our being we want the beauty, the thrill, the ecstasy of the kind of relationship with God that Adam had in the Garden of Eden. Yet when we go after pornography and immorality, we are being suckered by Satan’s counterfeit substitutes for God.
4. At the core of a
-
-
4. At the core of all sexual immorality is idolatry! Romans 1:18-32 documents humanity’s downhill slide into sexual perversion. It starts with the suppression of truth about God and failure to give thanks and glorify Him and proceeds from there. Notice, the next step is that people, “…exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images made to look like mortal man…” (Roman 1:23). Instead of seeking our satisfaction in the glorious beauty of God, we start worshiping images of women or, in the case of homosexuality, of men. This, at the core, is idolatry.
Undoubtedly, women are beautiful and God created them that way; they are, after all, the apex of His creation! God made them attractive and we attracted to them, but we aren’t to worship them. They are only creation. To worship them is to make them into idols and we need to repent of this and confess it to God.
5. The Creator has to be more beautiful than the creation! Reflect on this for a moment… Genesis 1:26-27 tells us that people, male and female, were created in the image of God. Now, which would you rather have, the real article, or a mere image of it? David understood this and was single-minded in his pursuit of God. He wrote, “One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek, that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek Him…” (Psalm 27:4).
David realized that God had to be more beautiful than what he created, whether it be man or woman, and he set his heart upon pursuing the sight of God’s beauty! Brother, the beauty and thrill you are seeking are found in God! Set your heart to seek Him!
6. God promised to satisfy you! God makes numerous promises in Scripture to satisfy our needs and desires. I won’t take the time to go through these and you can study them for yourself, but I will point out one that has become very meaningful to me. I’d like you to read and meditate on Psalm 81.
In this Psalm 81 God tells us that he is the One that brings us through times of testing (lack of sexual fulfillment, vs. 7), that we should not bow to false gods (make idols of women, v. 9), that He is the One who rescues and will fill us with good things (satisfy our desires in Him, v. 10). However, if we do not listen He will allow us to follow our own stubborn ways and turn to own devices (pornography and masturbation, v. 11-12). God concludes by saying that He would rather “…feed you with the best of foods. I would satisfy you with wild honey from the rock” (v. 16, NLT).
What man does not want “wild honey”? God is telling us he is able to satisfy us more through the Rock, Jesus Christ, than we ever can be with sex. The question is, do we believe it? Are you willing to test Him in this? When you feel tempted sexually, take that desire to God and literally cry out, in tears if necessary, for Him to satisfy you with His beauty. If you refuse to take the shortcut of pornography and masturbation, I believe God will do an amazing thing in your life.
The issues of the heart are fundamental in this battle we’re fighting. God is “able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine” (Ephesians 3:20). May you find Him to be all-sufficient for you today. My prayers are with you! Be encouraged!
-
-
In addition to the good advice others have offered above, here are some additional practical suggestions to help you in the fight.
1. Install an internet filter on your computer(s) if you don't already have one. Make sure someone other than you does the password setup. You may want to consider the filter at www.bsafeonline.com. It seems to work well.
2. Get in an accountability group with other men and a trusted mentor to whom you can confide and to whom you can report. There may be such a group in your local church or you can ask your pastor if they know of one in your area.
3. There are a number of good books out there relating to how to get free and stay free of sexual addiction and to avoid immorality. You may want to consider "Every man's Battle" by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker. Another helpful book is called "Desire" by John Eldredge. The latter is not about pornography and immorality, per se, but it does touch on it and encourages men to forsake these things and pursue satisfaction in God instead.
4. You may want to check out www.pureonline.com. They have online courses one can take. They are a bit pricey (around $200) but I've heard good things about them.
5. Probably most helpful will just be maintaining a daily quiet time with God. Keep in God's Word so it transforms your mind and keep crying out to him for deliverance and to have His mind about sex and sexuality.
6. Be ruthless with yourself in self-disciplining your eyes with the strength of the Lord: don't watch TV or movies without someone else watching with you to hold you accountable, no internet without a filter, no looking through catalogs or magazines with partially clothed women. You've just got to make the decision and "just say NO". "But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make NO provision for the flesh, to fulfill its lusts." (Romans 13:14, NKJV).
7. If you sense you may be the type of person who tends toward compulsive behavior, consider talking with a physician. Some compulsive, addictive type behavior is a result of an inbalance in brain chemistry and there is medication to help with that. Likewise, boredom or depression can also be factors in a obsessive desire to view pornography.
You are to be commended for your desire to rid yourself of pornography. To say that pornography hurts women is an understatement. Ridding yourself of this habit will honor your future wife, whoever she may be, and will put your marriage on a solid foundation.
-
Permalink Reply by Julia - Woman's Group Leader on
-
Hi Ben, Thanks for asking for prayer. Greg gave you some great insight... I wanted to add one more thing. I recommed the book Every Man's Battle by Steven Arterburn. I'll place a link to it here:
http://www.christianbook.com/Christian/Books/product?event=AFF&....
-
Permalink Reply by melanny manuputty on
-
can i help you ?
Some people they have some weak flesh problem like relationship, financial , identity etc .
The biggest difficult problem is pornografie..... a lot of woman & man of God fall in this area.
when i was fall in this area a years ago... i changed first my abitudine to look some porn movie , in TV , internet or magazine....by the other channel like preaching , worship , evangelism
that's is really hard ... for our flesh, but when i still make like my flesh the Spirit of the Lord told to me That's finish.....that's finish.You can't see God without Holyness said Lord to me one day.
I took some more pray & fasting ... and I promise to choose to be honest infront GOD.By canceling all the pornografie program with program of Jesus or something like that.
Now iam changed by the glory of the Lord ......
because also i really respect my God my body is the temple of GOD i can't make like what i want, event if i make contrast like the Spirit i will cry & pray ask forgiveness to God...
God understand me event you too.
He said to me " I understand that you are still in the flesh but go & not make sin anymore "
Now when my flesh crying out i said "By the blood of Jesus God please cover me from adultery spirit , fornification spirit , free sex , pornografie etc. When i past that time i feel how the present of the Lord changes me & all situation .Thank's God.
I hope can make you happy.
Keep going i will pray for you my brother JESUS LOVES YOU
Melanny from Italy.
-
Permalink Reply by onlyjesus on
-
PLEASE THERE IS IS A SPIRIT BACKING THIS BEHAVIOUR AND YOU NEED TO BE HELPED SPIRITUALLY, TO BREAK THAT CHAIN. BUT YOU MUST BE WILLING TO live a HOLY LIFE FOR CHRIST, USED PSALM 51 FOR PRAYER AND I WILL HELP YOU IN PRAYER TOO, DEAR
-
-
THE BATTLE IS NOT FOR US AND WE HAVE TO PRAY AND GOD WILL TAKE CONTROL BUT BE WILLING TO LEAVE SUCH THINGS
-
Permalink Reply by maricel on
-
God bless you my sister. God would be very happy that you decided to to leave those lust of the flesh.
-
Permalink Reply by StrivingforGod on
-
I share your struggle with pornography as well Ben. I keep telling myself I will never go back to it but yet constantly drawn to it. I also have an addiction to food. The only thing I feel we can do is pray to the Lord Jesus that he will help us break the chains of our addictions. Your sister in Chirst Mae.
-
-
Hi Ben smith,i think if we look at it this way,we can make progress and triumph in the end. The root is your preset mind over time.your defined type of woman that appeal to you.this preset mind any time your eyes sees a woman that fits your criteria ,signal is sent to your mind which in turn drive your passions.think ,any time you see a woman whose qualities are not preset in your mind you do not react. This explain why you do not react to some pic that do not catch your fancy.just change your ideals.Also stop seeing how you will benefit in flesh ,but see the pics as those of your blood sister. No man gets hook on his sister. Thanks for now.
Welcome to
All About GOD
The Good News
Meet Face-to-Face & Collaborate
© 2024 Created by AllAboutGOD.com.
Powered by
