Is Withdrawing from the crowd, also a sign that one is withdrawing from God?

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Grace Mercy on April 5, 2012 at 7:01pm

Great! Act of love and Kindness. wow.

Thank you so much for that insight Mary. Amen.

God bless you as you serve the Lord faithfully :)

Love you in Christ:)

GM

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Permalink Reply by Rita Cullimore on April 5, 2012 at 7:52pm

For all of you who think I still hold a grudge....that is not correct. I really don't like the way he preaches. I didn't hold a grudge against him ever. I just realized that if he was talking behind my back, I couldn't trust him with what I needed to hear. If he lied about me once, what is to stop him from doing it again and again? The word is nothing.

By the way, I was simply stating that people have a reason for not going to church. It may mot appear to be a good one, but they all do have a reason.

Blessings...

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Permalink Reply by Carla on April 6, 2012 at 2:29am

Rita Beloved,

 

I'm happy to hear that you don't hold a grudge.   No church will ever be perfect.  I think that is a sign of 'spiritual health' to attend church or not.  Attending church is not dependent upon salvation..but it is dependent upon functiong as a 'body', and good works, and fellowship, and corporate worship etc....

 1 Corinthians 12

 ¹⁴ For the body is not one member, but many. ¹⁵ If the foot says, “Because I am not a hand, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason ^[k]any the less a part of the body. ¹⁶ And if the ear says, “Because I am not an eye, I am not a part of the body,” it is not for this reason ^[l]any the less a part of the body. ¹⁷ If the whole body were an eye, where would the hearing be? If the whole were hearing, where would the sense of smell be? ¹⁸ But now God has placed the members, each one of them, in the body, just as He desired. ¹⁹ If they were all one member, where would the body be? ²⁰ But now there are many members, but one body. ²¹ And the eye cannot say to the hand, “I have no need of you”; or again the head to the feet, “I have no need of you.” ²² On the contrary, ^[m]it is much truer that the members of the body which seem to be weaker are necessary; ²³ and those members of the body which we ^[n]deem less honorable, ^[o]on these we bestow more abundant honor, and our less presentable members become much more presentable, ²⁴ whereas our more presentable members have no need of it. But God has so composed the body, giving more abundant honor to that member which lacked, ²⁵ so that there may be no ^[p]division in the body, but that the members may have the same care for one another. ²⁶ And if one member suffers, all the members suffer with it; if one member is ^[q]honored, all the members rejoice with it.

 

Another important role of the church is to take care of one another.  I have heard that people have experienced leaving the church, and then they fall ill...but have separated themselves...  They have lost contact with the people whom God has designated for them to receive care from if needed..and also care for others as they require it.  This is just one more small reason to attend.

 

Perhaps this church is so bad that it is completely and absolutely impossible for you to return.  If that is the case, then I urge you to find another church.  Have you considered searching this out?  Here at AAG we can help you.

 

There is not one place in the scriptures that says it is okay to stop attending church.  As i said earlier, it does not determine salvation, but it is a sign of our 'spiritual health'.  I urge you to please keep trying and not give up.

 

Bless you Rita.

I hope you receive this in the spirit it is intended.

 

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Permalink Reply by Tammy on April 6, 2012 at 3:26am

I as well, am happy to hear you don't hold a grudge. I would advise you, though you didn't ask for my advice,  to move on regardless of whose church it is or who the pastor is. You obviously feel this man is a liar & to see the man of God in such a light, there is nothing good going to come from it whatsoever. It only damages you as well as this church body. To continue attending just for your daughter's sake is not a good reason to continue. The outcome cannot be positive as I see you desire not to resolve the situation. Grudge or not, you still hold this man accountable for hurting you. The outcome can never be good in such a situation. It's time to move on sister. As Carla, I, too, pray you take this in the spirit it is intended. 

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Permalink Reply by Amanda on August 12, 2015 at 9:23am

This is an older forum post but still a great topic.

I think the reason(s) for withdrawing from fellowship is important even though it's a command that we not forsake assembling together and disobedience is inexcusable and can't be justified.

Right now I wonder why seek contact with any people anywhere -- all only will cause me further pain, because of my wanting so badly to be understood by them even when I can clearly see that they do not care? That fact only triggers my need to feel valued and loved, but not everyone is going to give me those things and when they won't give them it really hurts. I found that when I was in church, I would speak freely to people, with my heart wide open, but people were restricted in their affections for me and I'd want and long for them to widen their hearts. Very few ever did.

I'm not in church right now. I don't know if I will ever return to one or even how to return to one. My pattern is one of alternating between being connected and being disconnected. I withdraw into myself and into isolation and then get lonely and want re- connection. This is leftovers from childhood. It's what I learned as a child-- that being connected to people is living in chaos and arguing and having crises and being in turmoil.

I want to please people and win their favor but feel helpless knowing I never will (like past relationships in church) and that is the hurt I feel when I'm responding to others, now, who I think don't like me very well -- it's the same hurt that the little child felt who discovered people were abusive to her when she made them angry. I never felt I "fit in" in church or was liked.

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Permalink Reply by Grace Mercy on October 5, 2015 at 8:38am

Hello Amanda, 

Would you allow me to say, yea you do fit in a church and God wants you to be reconnected. When Christ mentions "church" I believed He is referring to us, whom He bought with a price, which cost His life on the cross. 

Referring to fellowships,  it is actually like, "we can not give - what we do not have",

Everyone at some point in life, longs for affection specially from the body of Christ "Church" but seeing each one in their eyes, they also are hurting, but are being hidden through their defense mechanism but actually longing for affections like you do and thanks to those few who wide open their hearts for you. 

Base on experience, the best connection we can make and open our heart wide with, is with the right source, our Heavenly Father and God Himself will bring to our lives those people that we do really need at some point in life.  But they won't be the same person God will use through out our lives, God will bring or connect us to different people at different stages in life. 

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Permalink Reply by Amanda on October 8, 2015 at 11:50am

Thanks for responding, Grace Mercy. I agree that people come in and out of our lives as God wills and leads others and ourselves.

I've been thinking about these things for a long time. I've had experiences where I've shared circumstances in my life and problems and so forth only to then be marginalized--socially excluded. I think some things should probably just be kept to oneself simply because if you share what you're experiencing or have experienced, and it isn't very pretty, then people might not know how to help.

Mental illness is an example, and it's really a paradox because people suffering mentally often do turn to a church or a congregation or a church leader for help with their suffering. Yet, mental illness (which is defined as a wide range of conditions that affect mood, thinking, and behavior http://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/mental-illness/basics...) is something that people, who don't have it, don't seem to want to talk about it.

So, I don't think anymore that people don't care or don't want to help (some might not, but not all) but I think now that they often just don't know how to help. One thing that I've personally encountered a lot is turning to someone just wanting to talk and to share my thoughts and feelings but having the person react by trying to give answers about why I'm suffering or even by trying to solve the problems for me. But all I wanted was just to know they cared.

I've said it before but it's worth saying again. I think everyone needs a friend or two in their lives who will show respect and support to them at times when they need it most. It means a lot just to have the listening ear of someone who will allow you to tell what's on your heart and mind, or what has happened to you, what you have experienced ... Someone who will want to hear about your experiences and who will support you and not deny your feelings but not think that you need rescuing, either, or tell you what they think you should do or even what they would do if they were you... Someone who will not give advice but maybe who will just help you get back in touch with God and with your faith and help you sort out right and wrong beliefs and define problems, while knowing that once you do these things, then the decisions you make will be your own, and you won't need to be told what to do but will be able to use your own problem solving abilities once again and, until then, just needed someone to care.

It's comforting to know people care. I think that people often leave a church because they think those in it don't care about them. But it's probably really just a case of the congregation not knowing how to help and care about them.

This isn't to say that some don't turn to the church or to Christians, wanting them to solve all their problems and rescue them and then get disgruntled when that doesn't happen for them. I'm sure that goes on a lot, too.

I want to grow to become that kind of friend to others that I just described-- the one who shows respect and support. I know I'm not there yet, either. Praise God for those who are such a friend! Thanks for listening <3

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Permalink Reply by Seek on October 17, 2015 at 2:13pm

In one sense it can be if you're not filling the need in other ways. We need to be with other Christians so we can bear each others burdens.

Ecclesiastes 4:12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.

It also gives us regular accessibility to hearing the Word and receive teaching by other stronger Christians. It doesn't mean we're in the right church but the body of Christ is the church. You can be in church and get nothing but get a lot from a small gathering.

But if you're not getting the Word in other ways and don't seek interaction with other Christians, you could find yourself falling away from God. You won't have the strength needed for a journey alone unless God has given one a gift to enable them to stand strong. But that isn't typically an overnight strength either. It takes years of walking with God through trials to gain strength. Yet even as strong as Paul was, he always had someone with him, such as Timothy and others. Even Jesus gathered His disciples and asked them to stay awake and pray with Him.

If there's no one to lean on in hard times, and God's voice is dim through the turmoil drowning out the still small voice, it's open season for satan to start digging his claws in.

Sometimes though things in life can make it difficult getting to every church service. And if one starts telling them they're falling away just because they can't attend Wednesday service due to perhaps work, then that person isn't following God's Word to encourage and lift up but can often be pushing them away from God.

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Permalink Reply by Seek on October 17, 2015 at 2:14pm

OK wow. LOL. Didn't realize this was so old. I guess there was a response that put it at the top of the list.

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Permalink Reply by Irene on November 17, 2015 at 2:08am

 Is this the right spot to answer? I was glad to read all this as I haven't been to a church for a long time, and wondered  about that.

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Permalink Reply by Grace Mercy on December 28, 2015 at 3:13am

Hello Irene, Thanks for the reply and I do hope you were joining fellowships now. 

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Permalink Reply by Irene on December 29, 2015 at 3:37am

Hello, Grace Mercy,  but no I haven't joined any fellow ship or any thing else, Thankyou for replying.

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