All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
Today I had a Church experience that made me feel uncomfortable.
Today I had a Church experience that made me feel uncomfortable.
Sometimes Churches will hand out a piece of paper or card, tell you to write down any sin that is getting between you and God and then, leave it at the Alter, Nail it to a Cross, or Burn it. The idea is to repent of your sin and leave it.
I was never put into a situation where I felt forced, or required to do something like this before. At youth group I've done stuff like this, and felt fine about it. But this time the preacher required everyone to do it.
I sat there and stared at my little card. And then I prayed.. Even after I prayed I felt unsure of what I should write on my little card. In fact I didn't even have a pen to pencil to write with, so I waited until we bowed our heads to pray again so that I could reach across my dad, to get the pen from the pew. Then I tried to write "Jealousy" My dumb pen wouldn't even write.
But I really was confused about I should write down.
The first thing that popped into my head was Lust
Then it was Jealousy.
And then it was Envy.
I think some of you guys already know that I have confessed these three before. In fact if your someone that has chatted with me for several years you probably already heard me talk about these issues before. If you were God you would know that I have talked about these issues almost every time I pray.
None of these three are sins that I even like to feel. But each has a different reason for troubling me. I don't believe in the idea that you can just leave every kind of sin there and it will never trouble you again... I think some things you just haft to deal with on a daily basis. It is like in Scripture where it says you must die to sin daily. (I was just googling this I can't seem to locate the exact scripture I'm looking for.)
Anyways I just wanted to get this off my chest.
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Seek on
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No confusion Gregory. You said several things came up. No one said only write one thing but anything. You could write them all.
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Permalink Reply by Tammy on
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perhaps the judgment you have against yourself that you may not measure up to your dad, in your eyes or his. I definitely agree with this part.
stop making an idol out of your father. I am not like him - That's good
If you will just ignore his presence and do what you hear God speaking to you, it will give you a new level of trust and hope in your Heavenly Father's approval. - Great advice
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Permalink Reply by ScribeD on
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Well, it came from God... so I kinda figured it was. :) Seriously, I'm not the kind of guy to put words in God's mouth and claim to "hear from the Lord"... unless I really do.
But thanks for the acknowledgment.
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But I'll at least have a pen, this time. ROFL. So, he's already prepared for you to sin next week huh? You need to come up with one friend.
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He could write....please forgive me, I went online and talked smack about the pastor. ;-)
Just kidding Gregory.
I guess if you feel forced to do this, you could always write: Lord forgive me for not being able to come up with anything that is hindering my walk with you, but I'm glad that I can't.
Wonder what they'd think of that one? ;-)
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Apparently God allowed me to have a learning disability and He allowed me to made fun of. So He must think some good is going to come of this.
You never know. You work in a school. And it's certainly a lesson kids need to learn...the effects of bullying or making fun of those with disabilities.
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I think Seek was being very facetious and cheeky. Not intending to slam you down with a guilt trip. We've all done it, much worse. It takes maturity to give your heart and mind a rest by really trusting in God, without finding the areas it rubs with "church". But, that's what church is about. A hospital for people with irritable sinners syndrome.
Rather than thinking of your struggles as something to be taken away, think of them as things to be mastered. A gelding (stallion that has been castrated) may not have sexual desire (although some still do), but he has just as much struggle to overcome his fears and take the bit and bridle as a stallion. Learning to develop self control and self mastery is a process. The Master will bring you to a place where you can trust Him to take your struggles into His hand and heal your fears, your sins and your pride.
Frankly, I'm not a fan of "revival" Christianity. I think it sometimes tries to compel us into faking obedience when the Spirit is actually working to develop our hearts first. [However, I'd rather have a hearty call to trust and obey than no call at all.] Sometimes revival pastors feel compelled to grapple and manipulate things into place, when God is gently pruning and winding the green shoots into a form that will grow and strengthen over time.
But... and I think this is vital... it's not about expecting to write a card and have everything "fixed". It is about learning to leave our burdens and struggles in Jesus' hands - every day. Doing it formally at church is just an outward expression of what you hunger for already. You can't fix yourself by yourself. However, the Holy Spirit can fill, grow and strengthen you to become more than you ever imagined. You are a work in progress. Rejoice! Because God says He is not ashamed to call you his child.
There is amazing grace available for you too! Keep asking for more - He has plenty to give. As Paul said, you are not only saved by grace, but will be sanctified by grace also. You can't force that. But, you don't have to.
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Permalink Reply by Mysty on
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I also would of been very uncomfortable with this group activity. I think the Pastor could have presented it as optional and I do believe many others in Church were also uncomfortable. When you prayed in church, God did answer your prayer and wanted you to leave the card blank. That's why the pen didn't work !!! lol lol Greg I think you are doing more than awesome and your Dad's comment tells me he feels the same way!! Thanks for posting this. It wasn't gossip or slander just you, sharing with AAG. BTW I went to a Catholic school for 8 years and I always lied to the Priest at confession... :/
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Great to see you again Mysty & love your answer God did answer your prayer and wanted you to leave the card blank. That's why the pen didn't work !!!
BTW I went to a Catholic school for 8 years and I always lied to the Priest at confession... :/ - Funny
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Thank you Tammy. I am so happy to know I was not alone with my lies at confession.. lol
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