THE PRODIGAL MOTHER

The Prodigal Son or Daughter

A wise son makes a glad father....But a foolish son is the grief of
his mother ---- Proverbs 10: 1

I think we all love to dip into the book of proverbs now and then because it confirms the fact that human nature in Biblical times was not so different from what it is today. We can see this in the first verse of chapter ten, which says: "A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is the grief of his mother". Does this sound familiar to any of you, especially parents of teenagers? When I was growing up (probably in the teen-age stage of life) my father would say to mom "YOUR daughter is far too cheeky " or "tell YOUR daughter not to wear so much makeup!" but he would tell other people that "MY daughter won a creative writing award, or MY daughter has passed her matric with 4 distinctions and if Mom took him to task for this, he just chuckled and kept on doing it! Does this sound familiar?

This observation in Proverbs reminds me not only of my own experience but also of the parable of the prodigal son, which is one that we can all relate to, especially those of us who have children. We know how desperately we love them and how we agonize over their mistakes, even as we realize that we must give them the freedom to make them. Why do we do this? Why not say, "O.K., you're on your own, don't bother me, I've done my duty and I'm finished with you". We can't do this because God made us in His image and He never says, "That's it, I'm done with you!" He gives us our freedom, knowing that we will make some mistakes, but He, like the father in the story Jesus told, waits for our return and runs to meet us, greeting us with great joy when we repent and return to His house. So can we humans do less?

I remember when my young son went to "Medical School" - he was only 17 years of age and I cried bitterly because he had never been away from home... He was so young and vulnerable... and then I realised that I would have to start praying more seriously than ever! This really brought me down on my knees most of my "spare" time. Then when my son came home for the first time he had grown his hair! My late husband was a Professor at a University and he was such a loving, caring, person but he admonished his male students who dared to grow their hair "too long"... (What is the definition of "too long" these days?) I did not feel to pleased about this but I (in my motherly wisdom) told my husband to ignore it. "It is just a phase..." There were many more things to worry about than his hair. I knew that we had laid his foundation strongly.... (forgive me for saying this but that is how an inexperienced young mother rationalises)... A few months later Benjamin came home again and SURPRISE! His long curly locks were gone! I gave my husband a look of "I told you so".. When asked why he cut his hair he said he had to study long hours into the night and waking up in the morning he had to wash and "blow" dry his hair and this was a chore he did not enjoy.

We have all heard the story many times, the wastrel son, the forgiving father, the jealous brother. But there is another element to the story that I have never heard discussed. Where was the mother of the prodigal son? Surely she must have had a role in this family drama?




I have a pretty good idea where she was, or at least, of what she was doing. She was praying! I am certain that all the time that her son was gone, she was beseeching God to keep him safe, to touch his heart, to bring him home. And who is to say that it was not her prayers that reached him in some way and reminded the son of his father's house? I do not mean to imply that the father was not concerned about what might happen to this son who was so determined to go his own way. He had hopes, no doubt, that his son would do well, but he must have had some fears as well, else why would he have been looking for him, so that he saw him from afar, just as soon as he came within eyesight range?

All of us who are parents have a sense of responsibility about how our children turn out. Even though we know they are separate individuals and, as adults, answer for their own lives, we still wonder, especially when they don't do exactly what we think they should, "Where did we go wrong? Should we have done this? Or perhaps we should not have done that?" I think that mothers are especially inclined to feel this way since it is they who have borne the major responsibility for child rearing throughout history. And mothers (like myself) spoil their children (and think that is because we love them)... I have grown older and wiser and realise that you "spare the rod and lose your child" - no matter what the legislation nowadays says. As a loving parent the odd "hiding" has been good medicine as long as it is done in love... and in moderation.

Whatever else he may be, a foolish son (and that of course includes daughters) is, indeed, the grief of his/her mother. And so mothers pray. We pray a lot. We pray especially hard when our children are teenagers and taking their first steps into adulthood, and we never stop praying for our children, no matter how old we or they get. And we keep on praying for them, no matter what they do.

I was impressed by a story I read in a magazine about a mother who traveled 500 miles, each week for a half hour visit with her son who was incarcerated in a state prison. And she did this not in the relative comfort of a car, but by subway, bus and train. When someone asked her why she did it, she replied. "He's my son. That's what mothers do." If that young man ever manages to turn his life around, it will be due to in large part to his mother, who never gave up on him. I suppose this also applies to fathers..

The following has always been such an inspiration to me:

St. Monica, mother of St. Augustine is a prime example of this maternal perseverance. Augustine may not have been in prison, but he was anything but saintly in his youth, causing Monica much anguish, but she persisted with her prayers and ultimately prayed her son into Sainthood. And that is the goal of every Christian mother – to pray her children into sainthood, or as close to it as she can! I do believe Monica prayed for 40 years for her son to be converted! THAT IS PATIENCE and GRACE....

In this parable of the Prodigal son we can see ourselves as willful children who have left our Father's house to go our own way and we need to remember that, no matter what the blandishments of our secular, often godless world, they are as dry husks compared to what is prepared for us in Our Father's house.




I asked earlier where was the mother of the Prodigal son? I should have asked, Who was the mother of the Prodigal son? For if we see ourselves as the Prodigal Son, and God is our father who runs to meet us with outstretched arms, then the CHURCH is our mother, who guides and nurtures us and whose prayers are constantly with us, even when we wander off on paths of our own self-will.

So,(IN OUR MIND'S EYE) let us, like the Prodigal Son, take the road of repentance. Our Father is waiting to receive us and our mother, the Church, is ready to nurture us with her prayers. The Prodigal Son did not just say, " Hi Dad, I'm back, can I have a job?" No, he fell on his knees and asked for forgiveness. And the Father ran to meet him and embraced him. And there is something in that embrace of forgiveness which truly cleanses and heals us.

The loyal and faithful brother was not impressed and he felt that he was being regarded as 2nd rate because his PRODIGAL brother was welcomed like a KING. Therefore, should we stray and come back to the CHURCH (our MOTHER) there should be feasting and joy. WELCOME THE STRAYED ONE TO THE BANQUET OF CHRIST.

FOND LOVE IN JESUS OUR SAVIOUR
RAMONA P.