All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
Hung By The Tongue
Learning to Speak Love!
Psalm 19:14
May the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer.
I am starting this conversation with a great sense of:
'Teach me God, because there is so much I need to learn here.'
It doesn't take much for relationships to spiral out of control when a harsh word is spoken.
It could even be that our intentions were right and pure.
We just stated them poorly.
We will never know someone else's circumstances.
Which is why we are not to judge.
We are not expected to know!
God Knows!---That's why we call on Him!
In The Book of Acts we read about Barnabas which means
(Son Of Encouragement). After Saul's conversion, the disciples were afraid to meet with him because of his terrible reputation. But Barnabas became the bridge between Saul and the apostles. He saw the potential in Saul, and encouraged that potential into a reality. We are called to do that. To believe the best about people rather than the worst. Despite their reputations, we are called to look at them through the eyes of God, and see what He sees. Assets, not liabilities. Beloved children in need of Grace and Mercy...and a big dose of truth filled love.
Eph 4:15
Instead, we will speak the truth in Love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of His body, the Church.
which leads us to are we...
Qualified to Confront???
We harvest what we plant--
Galatians 6:1-3
Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share eachother's burdens, and in this way obey the Law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.
We must check our own spirits and make sure we are not in the wrong spirit. We'd do well to examine why we feel compelled to speak:
1--Let us not become conceited.
Thinking we are better and incapable of sin.
2--provoking eachother.
Is my main motivation to prove that this other person is wrong, and I am right. Am I hoping this person will argue so they can be convinced of their sin?
3--envying eachother.
Do I secretly want to see the other person himiliated? Is my truth telling motivated by jealousy? A desire to get even? A need to see the other person exposed?
Calvin Miller explains it like this:
"Malicious truth gloats like a conqueror. Loving Truth mourns that it must confront and show a brother his error. Mailicious truth struts at its power. Loving truth weeps to find that the correction it inspires may for a while cause great pain. Malicious truth cries "Checkmate, you are beaten!" Loving truth whispers, "I correct you with the same pain you feel. But when the pain is over, we shall rejoice that honesty and love have been served.
In order to ensure that we only confront in the right kind of Spirit, it is suggested that we don't do it at all unless we have spent time in fasting and prayer.
Proverbs 18:21
The tongue can bring death or life;
those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
It seems that nothing is a more accurate indicator of my spiritual life than the words I speak. When there is a lack of Joy in God's Word, it is likely because I have not spent time in God's Word, Whatever our minds and hearts are set on, that is what will come out of our lives (and our mouths).
Psalm 141:3
Seat a watch O Lord, before my mouth, keep the door of my lips.
Matthew 12:36-37--Jesus speaking
"And I will tell you this, you must give an account on judgement day for every idle word you speak. The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you."
James 1:26
If you claim to be religious but can't control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.
James 3:5-6
In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. IT is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set of fire by hell itself.
Proverbs 10:19
When words are many, sin is not absent.
but he who holds his tongue is wise.
Taming Your Tongue
Take Responsibility for your words and begin to exercise restraint--Psalm 39:1
Listen more and speak less--James 1:19
Get rid of iffy language and innapropriate humor--Eph 5:3-4
Refuse to Gossip--Leviticus 19:16
Avoid Arguments--2 Timothy 2:23
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Eph 4:29
Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragment to those who hear them.
Read Psalm 19:14 and Matthew 12:36-37. Write out a prayer of confession, asking God to forgive your careless use of words.
Take a moment to pray for a friend who you know is going through a tough time. Ask the Lord to give you a verse to encourage him/her. Write him/her a note expressing God's love for him/her..then send it.
Who is the most encouraging person you have ever met? What qualities make him or her that way? What does this person do that encourages you?
Psalm 19:14
May the Words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer.
I am starting this conversation with a great sense of:
'Teach me God, because there is so much I need to learn here.'
It doesn't take much for relationships to spiral out of control when a harsh word is spoken.
It could even be that our intentions were right and pure.
We just stated them poorly.
We will never know someone else's circumstances.
Which is why we are not to judge.
We are not expected to know!
God Knows!---That's why we call on Him!
In The Book of Acts we read about Barnabas which means
(Son Of Encouragement). After Saul's conversion, the disciples were afraid to meet with him because of his terrible reputation. But Barnabas became the bridge between Saul and the apostles. He saw the potential in Saul, and encouraged that potential into a reality. We are called to do that. To believe the best about people rather than the worst. Despite their reputations, we are called to look at them through the eyes of God, and see what He sees. Assets, not liabilities. Beloved children in need of Grace and Mercy...and a big dose of truth filled love.
Eph 4:15
Instead, we will speak the truth in Love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of His body, the Church.
which leads us to are we...
Qualified to Confront???
We harvest what we plant--
Galatians 6:1-3
Dear brothers and sisters, if another believer is overcome by sin, you who are godly should gently and humbly help that person onto the right path. And be careful not to fall into the same temptation yourself. Share eachother's burdens, and in this way obey the Law of Christ. If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.
We must check our own spirits and make sure we are not in the wrong spirit. We'd do well to examine why we feel compelled to speak:
1--Let us not become conceited.
Thinking we are better and incapable of sin.
2--provoking eachother.
Is my main motivation to prove that this other person is wrong, and I am right. Am I hoping this person will argue so they can be convinced of their sin?
3--envying eachother.
Do I secretly want to see the other person himiliated? Is my truth telling motivated by jealousy? A desire to get even? A need to see the other person exposed?
Calvin Miller explains it like this:
"Malicious truth gloats like a conqueror. Loving Truth mourns that it must confront and show a brother his error. Mailicious truth struts at its power. Loving truth weeps to find that the correction it inspires may for a while cause great pain. Malicious truth cries "Checkmate, you are beaten!" Loving truth whispers, "I correct you with the same pain you feel. But when the pain is over, we shall rejoice that honesty and love have been served.
In order to ensure that we only confront in the right kind of Spirit, it is suggested that we don't do it at all unless we have spent time in fasting and prayer.
Proverbs 18:21
The tongue can bring death or life;
those who love to talk will reap the consequences.
It seems that nothing is a more accurate indicator of my spiritual life than the words I speak. When there is a lack of Joy in God's Word, it is likely because I have not spent time in God's Word, Whatever our minds and hearts are set on, that is what will come out of our lives (and our mouths).
Psalm 141:3
Seat a watch O Lord, before my mouth, keep the door of my lips.
Matthew 12:36-37--Jesus speaking
"And I will tell you this, you must give an account on judgement day for every idle word you speak. The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you."
James 1:26
If you claim to be religious but can't control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.
James 3:5-6
In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. IT is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set of fire by hell itself.
Proverbs 10:19
When words are many, sin is not absent.
but he who holds his tongue is wise.
Taming Your Tongue
Take Responsibility for your words and begin to exercise restraint--Psalm 39:1
Listen more and speak less--James 1:19
Get rid of iffy language and innapropriate humor--Eph 5:3-4
Refuse to Gossip--Leviticus 19:16
Avoid Arguments--2 Timothy 2:23
**************
Eph 4:29
Don't use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragment to those who hear them.
Read Psalm 19:14 and Matthew 12:36-37. Write out a prayer of confession, asking God to forgive your careless use of words.
Take a moment to pray for a friend who you know is going through a tough time. Ask the Lord to give you a verse to encourage him/her. Write him/her a note expressing God's love for him/her..then send it.
Who is the most encouraging person you have ever met? What qualities make him or her that way? What does this person do that encourages you?
Views: 210
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mandy on
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I think often about this very problem: "the tongue" sometimes i think many of us would be better without it, including myself. But, the Lord gave all of us a new heart. He took our hardened, decietful hearts and made them new. Think of it as reicieving a much needed Heart Transplant and you finally recieve it and it beats life throughout your body. Instead of being fatigue, short of breath and unable to do the things you could do before you recieved your heart transplant. Now you have a second chance. What an incredible blessing to have that second chance. And how would you honour that one which was the donor of your new heart! Would you not want to then lead a life worthy of being saved by this Grace! In this same way I think this way of my tongue. I must remind myself daily. But when I view it in this way; I praise the Lord for the new Heart (filled with Love); therefore my words must match this new heart. And I shall want to live with the gratitude of my new Heart. So l pray that our new Hearts will be worthy and we will speak Love from our new hearts with our tongues. Every day is a new chance at "life" Life recieved from the Lord, who is the great physician and donator of our new hearts.
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Permalink Reply by David Velasquez on
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WoW! Awesome....
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Permalink Reply by Ron Payne on
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THE TONGUE.
Below is a section of my booklet on the tongue. This portion deals with: Those little white lies.
There are times when lies are sometimes told to "protect" someone else and the choice to tell the truth or lie may prove extremely difficult. But no matter how noble it is to protect someone else. it is still a sin.
The important point to remember here, is that when this sort of lie is told, a number of issues begin to take place. People may think that they protect their friends, when they lie, but unfortunately they have:
A. HURT GOD.
B. HURT THEMSELVES. (They know that
they are Liars and can no longer delegate
the lie to the White Lies file)
C. The friend they may have protected may arrive at certain conclusions:
i. "They protected me, I appreciate that."
ii. "They lie to those whom they know; Can I ever trust them?"
iii. "What lies have they told me since I've known them?"
D. The person to whom they lied may also come to some conclusions:
i. "Their facial expressions and faltering speech are suspicious."
ii. "What they say does not add up."
iii. "I have a feeling of mistrust."
iv. "Did they not lie to me on a previous occasion?"
v. "Be careful; don't trust them too easily now or ever again."
E. The forces of darkness come to conclusions of their own:
i. "That was easy, they are old hands at lying."
ii. "Let us arrange a similar incident and force them to lie again."
iii. "Let's place mistrust in every one who is involved."
iv. "After we have stirred the pot and brought it to the boil, we can
bring the lie out into the open and create the following:
F. The liars are found out.
i. They feel terribly ashamed.
ii. They are no longer trusted and will possibly lose their friends.
iii. The one who was protected is in a similar predicament and has lost
face with every one.
iv. The Recipient of the lies, is extremely disappointed and no longer
wishes to associate with those whom he once considered his friends.
He may even come to hate them.
Those who have been inclined to delegate lies to a file called "Little white lies" need to remember some important facts, all taken from this 16th chapter in the book of Proverbs, verses 16 to 18.
God equates the telling of lies with that of MURDER.
i.e. "Hands that shed innocent blood."
He also equates liars with those who love to be
exalted or set up in high places independent of who
gets hurt. i.e. "A proud look"
Liars are placed in the same category with those
whose plans are wicked. “Whose thoughts and purposes devise
wicked imaginations."
Last but one, Liars and false witnesses are on the
same level in God' eyes, as those who are quick to
be associated with the creation of misery and evil.
Malicious people, who as the Bible says, have "feet
which are swift in running to mischief.
Finally, God hates Liars as much as those who
continually cause strife and contention.
i.e. "Soweth discord among brethren."
As difficult as it may be at times let us remember LYING is a sin against God, Who HATES a Liar and a False witness. Let us therefore STOP and keep in mind the following:
You have sinned against the Lord,
beware for your sins will find you
out (Numbers 32:23)
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Permalink Reply by Carla on
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Thank you Ron. This is so true. This has brought to mind a particular friendship of mine. I thought I had forgiven her, but it has brought into the light that I have not yet done so...Thank you!
It is so true how difficult it is to trust a person after they have lied. Let us all remember that forgiveness is for us and for them.
When we do not forgive someone, we leave them dangling from 'up on the hook' -with their feet waving in the air--just begging to be let down
SO WE MUST LET THEM OFF THE HOOK.
Unforgiveness also hardness our own hearts, and gives the enemy a foothold.
So now, I hand the situation over to the Lord and forgive my friend. I'm not going to bring it up to her, I think that would just cause certain hurts to resurface for her.
Blessings and Love, Carla
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Permalink Reply by MaryAnn on
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I agree Rick!
Thanks Carla for starting this discussion. It is near and dear to my heart, and I am starting over each new day, and doing the best I can...the Holy Spirit is my Guide. My biggest challenge seems to be to not say anything negative about anyone. This includes myself and my thoughts, as all speech starts with a thought.
God bless,
MaryAnn
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I have started this little exercise at work. Because the work place is the worst for me. When someone says something: hurtful, gossipy, or an inappropriate topic. I count to 10 before I let myself blurt out words that I can never take back.
But; what about my thoughts? Am I guilty for my thoughts of Anger, resentment, or more proud than the other; because I do not speak regarding inappropriate topics?
I was teaching my daughters the other day about Abel and Cain. They wanted to know why God did not accept Cain's gift. I told them the Bible never truly says, but gave them some possibilities. I used this example to teach them about dealing with anger and jealousy.
Cain was told by the Lord, to get rid of his feelings of jealousy for his brother or they would end up leading him to sin and his sin would eat him up.
So what I am asking is: If we are struck with these negative feelings, and we do control our tongues. Are we still guilt for our thoughts, or if we pray and get rid of our thoughts quickly will we be guilty????
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Hi Mandy...Great Question....
When these thoughts come over us we immediately turn them over to Christ. Repenting of them and asking for forgiveness. This is something which is ongoing...and it is the process of being renewed in our thoughts. We must give everything to the Lord, our Will, Mind and Emotions.
Mark 7:20-23
And then He added, "It is what comes from inside that defiles you. For from within, out of a person's heart, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed wickedness, deceit, lustful desires, envy, slander, pride and foolishness. All these vile things come from within, they are what defile you.
Jesus was making a point to the pharisees about 'Inner Purity'. Their thought was that the food they ate is what defiled them..by all their laws..But Jesus made it very clear that it was not what goes into their bodies (food) that defiles a person, a person is defiled by what comes from their hearts.
Philippians 4:8
And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of Praise.
Ephesians 4:23
Instead, let the Spirit renew your thoughts and attitudes.
Here is a great prayer:
Psalm 139:23&24
Search me O God and know my heart,
Test me and know my anxious thoughts.
Point out anything in me that offends You.
and lead me on the path of everlasting life.
I hope this helps!
God Bless! Carla
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Carla; thanks so much for the wonderful advice. Yes it helps. You are such a dear, to take the time to help others. Blessings in Jesus Christ.
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Permalink Reply by Pastor Bob B on
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I once heard it like this;
sticks and stones can break my bones, but words can break my heart.
A mature man or women is some one who never hurts and offends with his words.
I know in my own life I fail with my words, so I still got some maturing to get
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Satan seems to be unrelenting when it comes to the battle to master our tongues. Why? Because a tongue that is out of control casts doubt on the nature of true Christianity: “If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man's religion is vain” (James 1:26). As harsh a statement as this is, it wasn’t the only thing that James wrote about the tongue, it gets worse. In chapter three we find the clearest and perhaps the strongest condemnation of the damage inflicted by wicked speech: “5 Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell. 7 For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind: 8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. 9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. 10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be” (James 3:5-10). “Ought not so to be” (v.10) is another way of expressing God’s desire, “may it never be”! But it is! Failure to control the tongue is a sin that we are very familiar with, yet not always in an impartial way. It seems to me that we are quick to take note of it in others, and slow to condemn it when it surfaces in our own lives. The Bible calls this hypocrisy. Surely we would all agree on this one thing, James graphically portrayed the destructive potential that exists in this little member of our body. Its power is disproportionate to its size. Should we not stand up and take notice? “The tongue is a fire that sets on fire the course of nature.”
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Permalink Reply by christopher lingk on
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Carla,
I am so thankful that God uses people to get His message across !! I really needed to hear what you wrote because I have a terrible time controlling my tongue. I often forget how powerful our words can be..............they can "build up" or "tear down". I needed this reminder....thank you and God bless.
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