All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
Parents: Build Your Child's Spirit
May God bless you for your desire to help train up our children in the way that they should go. The bible says they will not depart from it. I want to encourage all parents, grandparents, teachers and child care givers to remember we are not just "law enforcers" and consistent in discipline and rewards but we must learn to build their inner spirit.
Because a child is very young or sometimes because they are far less experienced in life we tend to forget that they too are spirits which live in a body and possess a soul.
We cannot talk to them or treat them any old way and expect that to be acceptable. Although, they better not disrespect us as adults, or there will be consequences, it does not by any means give us the right to disrespect them. When I say disrespect them, I don't mean we are not to correct them, but I am referring to the way in which some adults may choose to correct.
We all have our way of doing things whether it is a result of how we were raised and disciplined or if it is just a way they we have just adopted on our own.
The bottom line is we must began or continue to do things the way God has instructed in His word and use His great example of the way He parents us.
"And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up." Deuteronomy 6:7
We are to teach them and talk to them ..not talk at them, about them or yell at them constantly.
We love to teach them Ephesians 6: 1-3;
" Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right. Honour thy father and mother; which is the first commandment with promise; That it may be well with thee, and thou mayest live long on the earth."
But let us not forget the next verse...
"And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord"
God is loving, compassionate, forgiving and patient. He is not a pushover, or passive, or whimpy or mouse-like. He says what He means and means what He says but He is not "mean". He does not bully His way onto us, He lovingly encourages us and guides us to righteousness. He rarely ever punishes us for things He has not yet taught us or has taken the time to explain to us. He does not correct us in front of our peers unless it is something He knows He has already warned us of openly. We should never deliberately embarrass our children or hold them accountable for something we have not clearly explained before hand.
God does not call us out of our name or anything beneath us. Instead He call us what we created us to be and what He believes we can become. We should never call our children negative names or describe them negatively. Their spirit will be weakened by our negative critical words. If we can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all. Sound familiar?
Even when we are talking to others about them we must be careful about what we say. Our words must build them up not tare them down. Our words must be seasoned with grace and the word of God …. just as we know they should be when we communicate with other adults. We cannot just be doers of the word when other are watching. We must be doers of God’s word at all times with all people. Including … no, especially our children. They are watching our lives and haring our conversation. They know if we are real with God or if we are all talk. They see if we are one way at church with them and others and a whole other way when we get into the car and at home.
If you really want to know if you are walking closely with the Lord ask your children or the children you teach.
We parents and teacher don't have it so easy...we are full-time parents, with careers, ministries, housework,bills, haters, and the list goes on and on and on. But being tired or frustrated dos not give us a pass to treat others badly or to disrespect our children. When we are tired or fed up with circumstances we tend to let all the rules fly right out the window. And then we say, we will pick 'em back up when we get some rest or get ourselves together or calm down. If you are guilty of this at times, and believe me I have been, just remember, it's the little foxes that destroy the vine. The ones we tend to overlook or pay less attention to because they seem so small. Just like we can easily take our children for granted also because they too are small.
They may disobey us or disrespect us... this can really frustrate us. How do you think Our Father feels about when we do the same? Our kids can know better and still insist on doing what they just want to do. How many times in a day do we do the same thing to Our Father?
Yet, He still loves us unconditionally. He doesn't make up a new rule out of the blue just because He's upset. He calmly reminds us that there is a consequence but He keeps on teaching us and leading and guiding us. His Love is so amazing. He still protects and provides for us even though we fail Him even more than we may realize. We cannot be hypocritical when it comes to what we expect from our children. Build them up in their spirit by ministering to them as often as you can. Tell them how great they are...and even more when they are displaying less than acceptable behavior. You don't overlook the bad entirely but you must focus on the good more than you do the bad.
You say things like..." I know you know how disappointed I am about "your behavior or whatever it is you are referring" but I love you and I believe you are going to do great things with the hand of God on your life." " I'm going to continue to pray for you, tell you what is right and you will have consequences if you choose to continually disobey me. But I and your mother/father are going to help you get to where I know you are destined to be." " I understand it can be frustrating when you want to do things your way and your parents are saying it has to be this way. I too have to answer to my heavenly Father and I can not do everything I want to do either. But I found, if you humble yourself, take a deep breath, you will find that what we are asking you to do is for your good and it is going to make you better if you hear us."
Remember the things that were said to you as a kid that hurt you and broke your spirit. The things you can remember right now as though it was yesterday. Or the negative voices in your head at times the devil uses to discourage you... especially when you're ready to do something great in the kingdom of God. Just do not repeat that same negativity with your children. Let them know that you believe in them and their future. Show love and support with the things that interest them. You may think they rather be with their friends but the truth is they rather have time with you...anyday.
Sometimes it's just about thinking before we speak or act. Something that the majority of us rarely do unless we are truly developing our relationship with God like we should be. And I'm not talking about the entire world, I'm referring to us Christians, followers of Christ. We, as a whole, are not spending enough time with God and in His word. The reason I know is because our behavior and character and attitudes are different when we are in His Presence. My whole persona is more like Him when I am with Him. I am better, I am stronger in Him, I am hidden in Christ.
When we are praying and in obedience to God everyone is going to benefit from a life of surrender unto God. Our spouses, our co-workers, other drivers on the highway( lol:) and yes, Our Children.
These are just a few of my thoughts this morning...the Holy Spirit prompted me to encourage you today to think of our children a little more. They understand and see more than we think. AND they are watching us!
In His Love,
♥Prophetess Arleen♥
http://WeaponsofWar.ning.com
http://KingdomLiving.ning.com
"No additives...No Preservatives... Just JESUS!!!"
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