Crying inside

How do you get out of a pit trap that keeps coming back? It seems like it's only a matter of time until something happens....

I know people tell you when you go through difficult things in life it's best to move on. But how do you move on when it's only a matter of time until it happens again? Wounds are re opened. I thought that life was different now. I thought there wouldn't be anymore cats in danger.

This has been going on since I was in 1st or 2nd grade. I graduated high school over 2 years ago,May 2011. How can I live in the present when the past keeps appearing over and over?

I was nieve when I was a little girl. I kept thinking they'd be safe. History has repeated itself long enough to realize otherwise.

This is different though. Before we let cats out. They got poisoned. We started keeping our cats in with Ms. Kitty,we got her in Aug. of 06. I was still hardened and scared something would happen,like one of them getting out. I was starting to unharden last year. The fear of one of them getting out was gone.

Well,the fear I had from the past came true. Now the fear has worsened than it was last year and before than. Now I'm scared any of them will end up sneaking out with the memory of Gracie. I feel like crying, I miss her so much. 

Why is it that it seems like no matter how many tears are shed the pain is still there?

 I hope I'm not depressing anyone...I hope I didn't ruin anyone's day with my post. :(