FACING HUMAN NATURE ISN'T ALWAYS EASY <a href="http://www.christianglitter.com"><img src="http://off1.picsrc.net/images/chrglt/profileExtras/iLoveJesusWhiteBlinkie.gif" border="0"/></a><br/><a href="h

Even though I have been subjected throughout life to the darker side of human nature, it still never ceases to stun, shock, hurt, amaze, bewilder and frighten me. We are all human. We are all capable of hurting one another in very deep and permanent ways. It is through the grace of God that I am promised eternal life and through the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, I am able to resist some pretty ugly things.

Today, I was faced with a challenge that sadly I have had to deal with a lot because of my former sinful ways. I lived a wicked life for which I try my best to remember is PAST, but sometimes it is thrown in my face and I am reminded of some pretty stupid things I have done. I am well aware that God allows some things to happen and others we bring on ourselves by deeds we do. What happened today was a mixture of both and I am trying to do my best to overcome and maintain my "salvation". I am hurt, I am furious, I am stunned and I am frightened. I am writing this to get it off my chest and remember that God is omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent. He knows what is happening. He is right here with me. He knows how it will come out. He will protect me from my enemies. Scary stuff is going on here and I am unsettled. It has thrown my whole day off COMPLETELY.

Briefly, I am a survivor of domestic violence. Without burdening any readers in this format of the horrors, he was and is insane. He has what is known as Othello Syndrome or paranoid delusional jealousy disorder. I pray daily for his release from the demons that hold him hostage. I have forgiven him the hurts and I am working on overcoming my fears and anxieties. He was arrested after the last instance which happened January 5. He beat me, destroyed my car, destroyed my home (broke walls, windows, furniture). I filed a protective order which the judge promptly reminded me was just a piece of paper and would not protect me if he did show up. How true this is, but I try and remember that God promised us that no enemy would have victory over me while in His care. I hold on to that. Today, however, I was reminded of how bad we humans can treat each other.

I did several things in the beginning of our relationship, unaware of the danger lurking. I wrote 2 checks over a year ago to assist him with a legal matter. He told me not to worry that his family would help me out through the situation. The checks bounced and of course I am liable for them. Sadly they were written to help this man that is now in jail for hurting me and causing me so much pain and sadness. Now here I am faced with warrants for arrest for these checks and HIS FAMILY called the police to notify them of my current address. They gave them my work phone number to call and where to find me. I am still stunned from the mean spiritedness and revenge tactics of people. I just can't fathom how his family can lash out at me. I am sorry he is in jail, but he beat me, destroyed my property and worst of all mentally damaged me. I had him arrested to protect me and my family and now his family is trying to get me in trouble with the law so I can't be credible to testify against him in court at the end of this month.

There is a good part to this story. Even though someone in his family called the DA and gave them all my information in order to, I guess, get revenge or make me hurt or suffer, that will not happen. The clerk that took the information from the "anonymous caller" as she put it, changed her mind after talking to me and decided not to issue the warrants for my arrest and in fact hearing my story agreed to allow me to pay the first check within 90 days and the 2nd after that. She said as long as she could reach me and I responded to her calls, she would not issue warrants for my arrest. She in fact acknowledged that they were well aware of this man and his problems (how much I wish someone would have warned me sooner).

The power of my Lord Jesus Christ. My God, the Most High promised if we abide in Him and He in us noone can ever take us from His hand. God proved to me today how true He is. I have lost faith in people but gained faith in my Father!!!! Trust in the Lord with all your heart for He will never lie or forsake you!!!! What satan meant for bad he will make for good. THANK YOU LORD FOR YOUR LOVE, GRACE, FORGIVENESS AND HELP!!!