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Deon B's Page
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Profile Information
- Gender
- Male
- Country (not County)
- United States Of America
- I'm here to...
- Learn the ways and gain knowledge to help me in my struggles between my spirit, sinfulness,this world corruption, and reaching salvation in the name of god before its to late...
- Interests:
- Understanding what it means to live a life of god and be a true Christian and not live in fear.
- I'm passionate about...
- Life itself and what it means to live a life of happiness.
- My story with God
- My story with god is something of what I call a hard work in progress. I live in one of the worst cities in america in which I come into contact with sin as if it was oxygen. It seems as the whole city and world is becoming damned everyday. I am 19 yrs old and feel that every mistake I make is gonna send me to hell. I have a troublesome heart that I conflict with everyday based on my religion as a want to be Christian. I recognized everyday that I sin a moderate deal daily as a teen. It seems everything I grew up in and live in these days are compelling me to sin sometimes without knowing it sometimes. I try and repent a lot ,but often feel guilty of what I do because I know better. I feel as though if i'm trapped between being fearful of not just sinning and god, but of worldly things and the idea of every time I do something knowing i'm going to hell. Up until today I just wanted to do something to better myself but couldn't keep the fight going. I really am still trying to be a man of god but its not only hard its mentally troublesome to steadfast at this age. I thought that if I take baby step such as not watching television based on the anti-Christian themes going on today and change some of how I talk to people and being a better person filled with what I should such as kindness and taming my tongue for what I say to people I can do it. Is this really what I need in order to consider myself a true Christian? Can I save myself from the temptation and demonic things thats going on in my life? Is this really the way to obtain eternal salvation in the eyes of god? or possibly, is it gonna be to late and ill end up in hell? Maybe guidance is the key, but as some people don't see, is that if you pay attention to the news, around your neighborhood, or even people attitudes that you knew towards resenting god or the idea of Jesus...can you tell that the end is coming? People may think i'm crazy or just over reacting but I tell you that I am in that sinful group of people because I sin too much also. I must admit when I was little, I knew this was coming and so I preyed that the evil would overtake whats really deep in my heart as a loving, cheerful, and happy person. I am utterly confused. I may have not have knew it to this extent but as I have just read, IF YOU ARE NOT FOR GOD THAN YOU ARE AGAINST HIM. I apologize that I am writing so much, but in this day and age sin is great and I don't want to get caught up in deceit and end up with a one-way ticket to hell. I am trying but is step by step good enough or is that just a way for me to never get to be where I need to be spiritually. Times are hard and people are tampering with the interpretation with the bible and I don't wanna be on the short side. I DO LOVE GOD but is that enough? I have the right mind in heart but this is complicated life I live and help is what I need.
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