All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
I fear I'm starting to go into a depression
I fear with as much as been going on I could be falling into a depression.
I think loosing Gracie is what helped push me into this. There's been a lot of problems but I think that helped do it. I mean I was given a shock when I found out my coision,a girl I used to talk with in junior high [she may have ended up as a bully but it still gave me a shock. It didn't help my cousion and her know each other] and possibly my friend is gay. That took time but I "adjusted" the best I could. Add to that I found out yesterday another girl I knew since elementary married another woman...
Than I find out from my parents that they think Gracie got out. I wasn't worried if I didn't see her for a few days because she's went and hid in the past and than all of a sudden she'd come out. I looked everywhere she could pretty much hide...she couldn't be found.
Last year I had this terrible fear that one of our cats could get out. I was terrified because I'm sick of cats getting poisoned. Betsy likes to posion them. My mom overheard Betsy's husband likes to do it with arrows and Howie...I know he's been warned by cops but you know how temptation is. I found out what he does to cats after he kills them. It is very gruesome. I still don't know to this day if he or Betsy got ahold of a cat that used to come around a year or two back,Opie. I named her that because she looked like Opie Taylor on Andy Griffith. Didn't know she was a girl at the time. The last memory I have of her is she was actting strangly. Not sure if she scratched me but she was very fussy. Very unusual,she didn't usually act like that. I never seen her after that.
Last year I was getting terrible flash backs and had an intense fear one of the cats would get out and get poisoned. I gave it to the Lord and started healing.
:sighs: This is a huge set back. I'm filled with fear. My fear of one of the cats getting out has become a reality.
Now I'm terrified my other fear will oneday become a reality. It didn't matter recently a knine vehicle was in front of Beth's place. They didn't turn her in. Welfare was there at the same time. The welfare lady said she is doing just fine.
Today mom heard the baby [9 months old] crying down the street. Mr. Greg got very upset with him and said "Shut up!" Who knows when his [or Beth's] anger will turn into ether a dead or very hurt baby...That scares me. And Beth knows Greg is abusive she don't do anything to stop him though. I'm scared she will ether flip out on one of those kids or the family. I now know Greg has anger issues,too. And I know she'd flip out if she knew she was told on. Please no one,don't tell,please don't tell. It'll only make things worse.
I've tried not thinking about it. But it's hard when new updates on abuse happen...like today.
And I'm frustrated because I'm so flawed with my nervous system and communication problems. I don't want to deny Jesus. And if one of the family starts talking loud and asks me if I believe He's God or some other question...I'm absolutely terrified I will deny Him. I don't want to deny my Lord for anything. I'm just so frustrated with a condition I can't control. You guys are so strong in Him. I'm not strong...
Anyways,I think I'm going into a depression because I'm on overload. I even noticed some symptoms of depression,not interested in things formly interested in. Also even little things are starting to get to me. I was so excited yesterday to see some rainbows [across the street and a nice one up the street]. The pictures were not good. I tried again today. There was a very big and absolutely beautiful one up the street and a nice one across the street. Pictures weren't usuable...I couldn't express how I was upset but I felt like I cried inside.
I don't know if I'm in a depression or starting to go into one. I just feel like crying because it's too much on me.
Views: 117
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by Carla on
-
Feet bees,
There are many things in this world which are simply too much for us to handle. Jesus hasn't left us and He never will.
There are two scriptures which come to mind.
Hebrews 4:15,16
1Peter 5:7
Hebrews 4:15-16
For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
I Peter 5:7
…casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you.Jesus sympathizes with us...and completely understands our weakness. He gives mercy and grace to us to help us when we need it. We are told we can come to Him---BOLDLY come to Him for help. We are also reminded to give all of our concerns to Him because HE cares for us.
It's important for each one of us to come to Him continually.
I wonder also.... If you are taking things on that are not your concern? Perhaps you may want to consider praying about the things that are so upsetting and then letting them go? Afterall, once we pray for a situation/circumstance, it is in God's hands. Once you give it to Him...Don't pick it back up again.
Bless you... Carla
-
-
Permalink Reply by feet breath on
-
Thank you Carla.
I gave the cat problem and the problem concerning Beth to God before. It just makes it so difficult when I get set backs. It than comes right back. Than fear sets in again. It's like a cycle. I'm ok until something happens,like Gracie getting out for ex. I was hoping that they would be no more worries and they'd be completely safe in the house. She some how found a way out though. And since that fear of one of those cats getting out has come true I'm scared my other fear will come true concerning Beth.
What wouldn't be my concern? The cats,Beth/Mr. Greg abusing those kids or my nervous and communication condition or what happened to my cousion and those other people?
-
-
Permalink Reply by ribbon on
-
Feet , my heart goes out to you. There ar so many cat lovers out there who maybe is taking care of your cat. Maybe another cat befriended your cat.... there is hope. I know a lady I used to work with.... she did not like cats and never wanted one. That was until two grown cats kept going into her yard on her porch. She would come to work complaining that the cats were still there. She later confessed she was feeding them.... later she let them in her house and kept them. She loved them..... Maybe you can put a ad in the lost animal section in the local paper. Thinking about you Feet... and will say a prayer .
-
-
-
Feet Bees,
There are so many verses about fear.. They are commands to 'not fear'....not suggestions. :-)
Anything that you are going to be concerned about requires action of some sort. If there's nothing you are able to do, or consider doing, than for your own well being you've got to let it go.
For anything that you are going to be worried, fearful, concerned over, let those things turn to action.
If you sit at home turning them over and over in your mind it's only going to debilitate you. Does that make sense?
In love and prayer,
Carla
-
-
Permalink Reply by Lena J on
-
Dear Feet...NO, you're not going into depression. Those thoughts and feelings are not from God. You're experiencing another attempt by the devil to pull you down. Don't give in to him!
Remember the words of 2 Timothy 1:7 "For God hat not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
Saturate your mind and home with Hymns and Spiritual Songs. I particularly like the words of "What a Friend We Have in Jesus."
I declare you of sound mind, my friend. Oh, one more thing, leave Gracie in God's hands. After all, He created her! Your worrying only makes you sick. So, stop! Stand instead on the Word of God.
Be Blessed! Be Comforted!
-
-
-
Thank you guys...I did give them and their homosexuality problem over to God.
I guess a way to describe this is something like PTSD.
She's been doing this to cats since I was in 1st or 2nd grade. She came when I was in 1st. I graduated high school a little over two years ago,May 2011. That is how long it's been.
I know I need to trust God but how can you have faith when there's so much fear? And the fear is this isn't going to stop....this chaos will just continue. I'm terrified I'm going to loose another cat. How can I be assurered another cat won't get out? How can I be sure another one won't be killed...It's too much to bear to think that this chaos will just happen again. :(
How can I be sure Gracie isn't going to end up as Howie's fertilizer?
-
-
-
Feet bees,
I'm happy to hear you have handed some things over to God. I hope your burden has been partly lifted since doing that.
We can't control what others do...but we can control our responses to what they do. The best you can do is protect the cat from escaping outdoors, and ask for God's protection. If things go wrong (which they always do in this world), than we have the opportunity to show God's Grace and Forgiveness and Love. In our own strength we can't do these things... But with God all things are possible.
It's heartbreaking to lose a pet. I hope and pray she'll be okay.
The girl who is harming pets needs prayer and help.
-
-
-
I don't want to be mad at Howie,Betsy or her husband. I just want my cat back...
And yes Howie,Betsy and her husband do need Jesus.
Betsy and her husband live next door. She posions cats [and even atleast has poisoned a couple peoples' dogs] and my mom overheard Betsy's husband likes to do it with arrows. Bill and Teresa live in the other house beside us,they don't hurt animals. But next to them is Howie. I'm terrified Gracie will become Howie's fertilizer for his garden...
-
-
-
Praise God, thanks to all of you for praying! Gracie is back. I'm not depressed;I no longer have to worry that she will be fertilizer or poisoned. I gave God the problem concerning Beth, Mr. Greg and the kids.
Please do pray the cat killers;Betsy,her husband,Howie and Mike[I found out from mom today Mike helps Howie kill them] find Jesus though.
-
Welcome to
All About GOD
The Good News
Meet Face-to-Face & Collaborate
© 2024 Created by AllAboutGOD.com.
Powered by
