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The Joy of the Lord is our strengh.

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The Joy of the Lord is our strengh.

Let's have a laugh. We are criticized by outsiders because of the many divisions among our Christian family, but for now let’s put all that aside in this group and have a laugh about it. THIS GROUP IS OPEN TO ALL WHO WANT TO JOIN

Members: 255
Latest Activity: Mar 5, 2018

Denominational Humor
How many _________ does it take to change a light bulb?

1. Charismatics? Only one since his/her hands are always in the air anyway.

2. Presbyterians? None. God has predestined when the lights will be on and off.

3. Baptists? CHANGE???????

4. Pentecostals? Ten. One to change the bulb and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

5. Catholics? None. They always use candles.

6. Episcopalians? Ten. One to actually change the bulb, and nine to say how much they liked the old one.

7. Church of Christ? None. There's no evidence that light bulbs were ever changed in New Testament times.

8. United Methodists? We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulb works for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship to your light bulb and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life, and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence through Jesus Christ

hahaha

Discussion Forum

Rejoice I tell you, REJOICE

Started by David Velasquez. Last reply by Jessi Perez Oct 9, 2012. 31 Replies

Please bless us with clean Christian jokes so we can exercise the tummy. :)Continue

Cartoon fun and more!

Started by David Velasquez. Last reply by Prophet Mar 7, 2011. 15 Replies

Come on family share with us some funny cartoons andvideos.Continue

Comment Wall

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Comment by Rosa Elia on May 12, 2011 at 9:49am
Hahahaha, what a nice way to start the day! Thank you, God bless you!
Comment by Prophet on May 12, 2011 at 12:21am
I just love this one Be Blessed
Comment by Prophet on May 11, 2011 at 11:25pm

Ha Ha LOL you guys are something  David......whats up with you LOL ;-)

Comment by RoyW on May 11, 2011 at 8:40am

I've heard these before so these are a repeat:

 **A father was approached by his small son who told him proudly, "I know what the Bible means!"
His father smiled and replied, "What do you mean, you 'know' what the Bible means?
The son replied, "I do know!"
"Okay," said his father. "What does the Bible mean?"
"That's easy, Daddy..." the young boy replied excitedly," It stands for 'Basic Information Before Leaving Earth.'

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There was a very gracious lady who was mailing an old family Bible to her brother in another part of the country.
"Is there anything breakable in here?" asked the postal clerk.
"Only the Ten Commandments." answered the lady.

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"Somebody has said there are only two kinds of people in the world. There are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good morning, Lord," and there are those who wake up in the morning and say, "Good Lord, it's morning."

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A minister parked his car in a no-parking zone in a large city because he was short of time and couldn't find a space with a meter.
Then he put a note under the windshield wiper that read: "I have circled the block 10 times. If I don't park here, I'll miss my appointment. Forgive us our trespasses."
When he returned, he found a citation from a police officer along with this note "I've circled this block for 10 years. If I don't give you a ticket I'll lose my job. Lead us not into temptation."

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There is the story of a pastor who got up one Sunday and announced to his congregation: "I have good news and bad news. The good news is, we have enough money to pay for our new building program. The bad news is, it's still out there in your pockets."

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While driving in Pennsylvania , a family caught up to an Amish carriage. The owner of the carriage obviously had a sense of humor, because attached to the back of the carriage was a hand printed sign... "Energy efficient vehicle: Runs on oats and grass. Caution: Do not step in exhaust."

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A Sunday School teacher began her lesson with a question, "Boys and girls, what do we know about God?"
A hand shot up in the air. "He is an artist!" said the kindergarten boy.
"Really? How do you know?" the teacher asked.
"You know - Our Father, who does art in Heaven... "

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A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump.
"Reverend," said the young man, "I'm so sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip."
The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business."

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People want the front of the bus, the back of the church, and the center of attention.

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Sunday after church, a Mom asked her very young daughter what the lesson was about.
The daughter answered, "Don't be scared, you'll get your quilt."
Needless to say, the Mom was perplexed. Later in the day, the pastor stopped by for tea and the Mom asked him what that morning's Sunday school lesson was about.
He said "Be not afraid, thy comforter is coming."

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The minister was preoccupied with thoughts of how he was going to ask the congregation to come up with more money than they were expecting for repairs to the church building. Therefore, he was annoyed to find that the regular organist was sick and a substitute had been brought in at the last minute. The substitute wanted to know what to play.
"Here's a copy of the service," he said impatiently. "But, you'll have to think of something to play after I make the announcement about the finances."
During the service, the minister paused and said, "Brothers and Sisters, we are in great difficulty; the roof repairs cost twice as much as we expected and we need $4,000 more. Any of you who can pledge $100 or more, please stand up."
At that moment, the substitute organist played "The Star Spangled Banner."
And that is how the substitute became the regular organist!

When you carry the Bible, Satan gets a headache..... When you open it, he collapses..... When he sees you reading it, he faints..... When he sees that you are living what you read, he flees.....

 

Comment by David Velasquez on May 11, 2011 at 8:40am

hahaaha hahaaha The mums test - good one.

 

All I have to say is that, the All mighty does not go by "Mum," but by Father. :) hahaha

Comment by Prophet on May 11, 2011 at 4:48am
Hmmm, LOL wonder what David would say about that lot ;-)
Comment by RoyW on May 11, 2011 at 4:23am
Well, the Prophet certainly passed that test. The guys will understand. The ladies will not be able to figure that one out.
Comment by Prophet on May 11, 2011 at 4:14am

 LOL, guys just don't get it, we have to do that so that they don't feel left out or "rejected" so when we do that all we are saying is" I love it when you help me honey" ;-)

 

Comment by RoyW on May 11, 2011 at 3:58am
They need to put a little more technology on that "mum" test. Or maybe the "mums" use their lack of technology knowledge as an excuse to get the "dads" to do something. "Honey, can you do this for me? I can't figure it out."
Comment by Prophet on May 11, 2011 at 1:08am
LOL missed you brother
 

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