All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
What Does it Mean to Build One Another Up and How is it Accomplished?
The Bible teaches a lot regarding building one another up and encouraging one another.
What are some examples and practical ways that we can do this?
When have you ever been encouraged or built up by another child of God?
What can we do on TheNET as the family of God to better build each other up?
Lord Bless,
LT
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by ribbon on
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I will say one more thing and then I will just be reading in this discussion instead of commenting any further. This is because of I don't want to case conflict not because of anything said. ...
I am seeing you correcting someone here in this discussion and using scripture to do so. I also am seeing the topic questions being answered in what "not" to do to encourage your fellow brothers and sisters. I am hoping to read things , ideas of what to do to encourage. Ok now I am done.... If anything is directed to me I will read it but not reply. I hope yall don't wuickly change your minds of the encouraging words yall said to me earlier. I am sorry.... I just sometimes start to get a little defensive.
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Permalink Reply by Amanda on
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Janie,
What you're seeing is correct because you are very intelligent. Correcting one another in love is possible and is a part of building one another up. See Romans 15:14. When circumstances call for it, God asks us to give instruction to those who need it. Disagreeing with someone doesn't mean we are being unloving but that is a common misconception.
When would it be an appropriate time to comfort someone rather than correct? We rely heavily upon the leading of the Spirit to help us discern this and we don't always get it right. I seldom seem to get it right.
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Grazer,
At this time, I wish to give my view regarding only the first thought you listed (I may address the rest of what you've said later) and, while, I understand and acknowledge where you're coming from, I disagree with your first thought very much because, while there may be problems with qualifying the statements one is making, there are several positive reasons for doing so.
1) It is showing sensitivity to the person with whom you are speaking and ensuring that the relationship remains secure even though you are sharing the reasons that are stopping you from agreeing with their POV.
2) When someone expresses an opinion, such as, "This phrase should be banned," all it takes is for another person to find one reason why that phrase shouldn't be banned and then the statement about the phrase itself becomes unqualified.
3) In Scripture we find many qualifying statements that are given right before a very strong stand upon the Truth is made.
Here is one example from 1 Cor 4:
14 I do not write these things to make you ashamed, but to admonish you as my beloved children. 15 For though you have countless[b] guides in Christ, you do not have many fathers. For I became your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel. 16 I urge you, then, be imitators of me. 17 That is why I sent[c] you Timothy, my beloved and faithful child in the Lord, to remind you of my ways in Christ,[d] as I teach them everywhere in every church. 18 Some are arrogant, as though I were not coming to you. 19 But I will come to you soon, if the Lord wills, and I will find out not the talk of these arrogant people but their power. 20 For the kingdom of God does not consist in talk but in power. 21 What do you wish? Shall I come to you with a rod, or with love in a spirit of gentleness? (ESV)
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Permalink Reply by Grazer #E2H on
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Amanda - simply saying "I'm saying this in love" does not mean you're showing sensitivity, you show that in what you say. If you feel you have to add "I'm saying this in love" youre better off rethinking what you put. It's like when people say "I don't mean to be rude" I just know the next words they speak are going to be rude. Similarly here, the moment someone has to add the "in love" qualifier I just know the next words are not going to be loving. Vicious words remain vicious words, adding a qualifier doesn't change that, just means the person is trying to justify their viciousness.
As for the passage, yep Christians havegot the admonishing and correcting and rebuking down to a fine art which is my main point in responding to LT. Paul is also essentially saying he's not happy they're not following him. Well we're not supposed to be anyway.
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Grazer,
Basically, you're saying that even where the Scriptures correct, the correction isn't done in love whenever the one correcting is led by Holy Spirit to say they are speaking in love. What it sounds like you really mean is that any form of correction or being told that you, personally, are wrong about a POV is painful for you and therefore unloving.
As for your other points, it would be futile for me to share my views because what you have said in one of them is that the one who believes you're wrong is not willing to learn. You believe I'm wrong and that you are completely right in all of your thoughts and therefore are not able to learn from differing POVs about this topic. This attitude carries over into many areas, from what I have experienced in talking with you.
You said:
7) You're not really looking to learn if you proceed to tell someone they're wrong.
You just told me I'm wrong and that Saint Paul and the bible are wrong, too.
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How did you get to "I'm saying the bible is wrong" from point 7? Point 7 has nothing to do with what you've responded with. If you're looking to learn, you ask questions not jump in with "you're wrong" That says to me you're not looking to learn but want to debate/discuss.
I'm not saying any correction of me is not in love, you're either misunderstanding, misreading or misrepresenting me. Or I'm not explaining myself properly. I'm saying you shouldn't need to add a disclaimer that your thoughts are said in love, it should be obvious from your words that it is.
Yes I believe I'm right, I wouldn't hold the views I do if I didn't.
Can I take it from your comments you don't agree with anything I've said then?
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Grazer,
If you're not saying that Saint Paul and the bible gets this wrong, then what are you saying?
You said: "As for the passage, yep Christians havegot the admonishing and correcting and rebuking down to a fine art which is my main point in responding to LT. Paul is also essentially saying he's not happy they're not following him. Well we're not supposed to be anyway."
Will you clarify what you mean?
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Ok, so you're referring to that portion. You quoted something else hence the confusion. I look that passage and I see Paul who's unhappy they're following someone who isn't him. He's saying "I came to you, I became your father you should be imitating me not these other people, it's why I sent you Timothy" Well we're not meant to be following Paul, were meant to be following Christ, that's why we call ourselves Christians.
As for the rebuking part, that's what my "post if you agree with someone and not correct them every 2 lines" It seems were extremely quick to point out others faults but not so quick to praise them. If all someone hears is rebuking, they're not exactly going to feel uplifted, people need to hear when they're doing well.
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What is the ratio for how many times you rebuke and how many times you comfort? Is it 4 to 1? Are you not rebuking me in this discussion? How many times have you pointed out a praise concerning me?
Many times we want from others what we aren't willing or perhaps aren't able to give them.
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Just about blog post of yours Ive responded to? I'll back through all those and the forums if you would like specifics.
Why even focus or worry about rebuking? Focus on lifting people up, the rebuking should always be secondary so pick any ratio you want; 7:1, 700:1 I've already admitted and freely admit I contribute to the problem so yeah I need to change, I need to stop being as defensive, not sure how that invalidates my point but I take yours and go with it -
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My point is that a ratio is ridiculous when what we are asked by God to do is seek wisdom in this matter and follow the Spirt's leading, not our own leading. Many times we speak to people out of our own experience, and, at times, that may be appropriate, but if it's something we have not experienced ourselves, then we may not know what will be helpful to another person. It's then when we go to God in prayer for that person, asking God for wisdom.
I've always appreciated when you have been supportive of me and shown care.
We focus on correcting when circumstances call for it, according to God's leading. Correcting IS a form of building up people! -
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I'd be interested in hearing your thoughts on the other points I made
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