All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
Praise the Lord for this sight!
I am so grateful to the Lord Jesus Christ for providing this sight. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for most of my life. It's never been this bad though. I am almost unable to work and concerned that I'm going to lose my job. I keep asking God, "What happened to me? Who is this person, where did the REAL ME go?" I've been praying and reading the word daily. I've been to church every week and as many services I can throughout the week. I've counseled with several pastors and some secular ones who by the way- will only make you focus on yourself more and not the Lord. (the secular counselors) My Mom understands what I'm going through because both she and my grandmother have had it. My sister also has it. I've been trying to not be so selfish- to think of and serve others and the Lord. I prayed so hard that I would enjoy the Lord and others today. I didn't. I actually am worse today than I have been. I take meds and the one "emergency" med has helped me to calm down which is good. One of the problems is that I feel guilty. I feel guilty for taking the meds, guilty for not witnessing, guilty for feeling this way, guilty for being selfish. GUILTY GUILTY GUILTY and you know who the author of guilt is, don't you? SATAN! I hate the devil. I hate him and I will resist him. I will draw nigh to the Lord because He can protect me. He can strengthen me. He can show me how to live through this and honor Him in doing so. I am not letting God control this situation. When it gets really bad, I think I must not be His child. And even in reading the word, I feel guilt. Everywhere I go and everything I do- guilt guilt guilt! Oh God, comfort me. My Jesus, my savior, I know thou art mine... I don't want to feel like this anymore. I want to stop being so selfish and live for the Lord...
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mercy777 on
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Dear Laurie,
My heart is so full of compassion for you. I my self will give testimony of the beautiful mercy and grace of the Lord Jesus.
I went through depression for about 3 1/2 years. I actually did not know I was depressed untill I went in for a physical. I was weeping continually, couldn't hold down a job, felt completely worthless and guilty I had not listened to the Lord.
I was from a extremely abusive marriage, one the Lord had me wait 20 years to have and completely scripturally decieved.
Naive, ignorant, wanted to die and scared to death. This was a far cry from the life of a store manager responsible for people, customers, budgets far exceeding,raising a family alone and taking care of a home.
So the doctor prescribed meds. However the Lord only allowed me to pay for them for six months. I slowly went off them
after the 3rd month with prayer and the Lord's help. The Lord gave me a part time job and very slowly (His timing) I was changing. God gave me a passion to study His word, especially the Psalm's and Proverbs, then it continued into subjects, such as all the scriptures of love, mercy, grace, sin etc.Each indiviually. However in this time I also asked the Lord who have I become and who am I? I remember praying for the Holy Spirit to show me all my sin so I could get it out of my heart and soul. He did...Praise you Father!!! It wasn't pretty, it was the truth! Jesus loves you and I so much He would of rather died than live without us. And He did. God shows mercy and forgives us, then He gives his endless beautiful grace in our time of need. The faith in me is from the author and perfector Jesus. Faith was not here until He came and got me. What I know the most...I am so loved by Jesus and he wants His best for us. I am His and He is mine.
I am praying for you Sister, we have a Mighty God, He just keeps on saving us.
God Bless you,
Mercy
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