my husband and i nearly hit rock bottom today...well we pretty much did. i feel like i have no strength to keep things going. i feel like im giving 110% and getting only 5% back...God put him in my life for a reason and me in his life for a reason. i did a lot of changing and straightening up and i feel like he has done nothing for me. He continually lies to me, watches porn, drinks (he has slowed down), he does things behind my back, he makes me feel like crap some of the time and i feel torn down..during the day i am in a wonderful mood and in love with God but then when he gets home and says or does something to hurt my feelings i just wanna give up. i feel like its the devil coming in and trying to tear me down one way if he cant tear me down another, and by golly it works! I try so so hard to listen to God and stay calm but it doesnt work. God told me to come on this website and I believe this is why. i need to vent to other christians and get the word of God and prayers. i have made mistakes when my husband and i had just gotten together (still boyfriend and girlfriend) and i told him that i was sorry and would never do it again and i kept my word..to this day he still doesnt trust me and its been nearly 2 years. He uses my mistakes as a reason for his wrong doing even today. I feel like i cant go on with a liar and with someone that constantly does things behind my back. I told him watching porn was cheating and he insists that it isnt. I cant get anything through his head. When i try to make things better and talk things out, he acts like he doesnt care..I really need your prayers because i cant do this on my own....thank you and God bless!
keep your focus on jesus, ask for a peace of mind, please dont give up no matter what your husband say to you, you are a child of GOD, no weapon formed against you shall prosper,any word that comes against you shall be condemed in the name of JESUS, I REBUKE EVERY EVIL SPIRIT THAT SURROUNDS YOUR FAMILY IN THE HOLY NAME OF JESUS, stand strong for god is with you, i am a witness prayer changes things in due time. We are here for you AAG :)
thank you for this encouraging message. Its nice to know that you are not alone when you feel like you are. Its great to know that you are loved by the most amazing person. thank you again, God bless!
The good news is that God does not want you doing it on your own; He wants you to die to self, SURRENDER TO HIM, and allow Him to work through you.
Our God specializes in restoring, the more impossible the better. He gets more glory from turning situations as yours around. But our responsibility as he has commanded us is to be involved in the ministry of reconciliation. Hard work, but God can equipped you sis.
2 Corinthians 5
17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. 18 Now all things are of God, who has reconciled us to Himself through Jesus Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation,
The old you cannot do this but the new and real YOU in Christ, can be use by God to turn this all around.
Is you hubby Christian?
1 Corinthians 7:13 And a woman who has a husband who does not believe, if he is willing to live with her, let her not divorce him.
If there is ever abuse you can separate but not divorce according to the word of God.
Live in holiness so your prayers can avail much-
James 5:16 (New King James Version)
16 Confess your trespasses[a] to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.
IT IS GOD'S WILL FOR CHRISTIAN MARRIAGES TO SHINE FOR HIM, TO BE AN EXAMPLE, SO HE WANTS YOU TO SUCCEED. You can pray boldly proclaiming His will for marriages.
Here is what God is asking you to do in this situation:
1 Peter 3
Submission to Husbands
1 Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands, that even if some do not obey the word, they, without a word, may be won by the conduct of their wives,
Your hubby does not obey the word either because he is not saved or because he has not established or cultivated a good relationship with God.
I believe the verse is talking about a non-Christian husband. Peter like Paul does not urge the Christian wife to leave her husband, to preach to him (without a word), or to demand her rights (to be submissive, not to sin of course), so the husband can be won by the conduct of the wives. Love never fails, he expects you to blow up etc... Keep loving him and he will not even know how to react to that.
...won by the conduct of their wives - The loving gracious submission of a Christian woman to her unsaved or backsliding husband is the STRONGEST EVANGELISTIC TOOL she has.
To be submissive - woman are NOT inferior to men in ANY way, any more than submissive Christians are inferior to secular bosses, but wives have been given a role which puts them in submission to the headship which resides in their own husbands.
Sis I have given you the truth, the Word of God, if you apply it, it will bear fruit.
Your family is in my prayers*
thank you david....my struggle along with every other woman by nature is the whole submissive thing. i can be submissive and when i am things are good, but i guess its just that mind set that women have to be in control and when they arent things tend to go bad. i find it hard to love when i feel angry or any other negative emotions so i talked to God tonight and things got a lot better and there was peace! it was amazing, i gave him my problem and he is dealing with it. Praise the Lord for He is good :) thank you for your words! You sure are a true helper of God!
I have a different take on this... and this comes from 36 years of marriage, and watching others around me discenegrate. In my case, I got physically and emotionally sick, and now, that I am out of the situation, I can see that the did everything within his power to push me into asking for the divorce, so that he could come out looking liked the offended party...instead of the other way around.
If a man is hooked on porn... to me, that is reason enough to leave him.
Jesus said if we look on a woman to lust after her, we have committed adultry... and there my sister, is your out.
I see nothing in his actions that says in any way, that he wants to meet you 50/50, or that he gives flip about what God thinks.. seems to me his only interest is self.
You cannot change this..and even Jesus seperated his disciples when they did not agree.
Marriage is a give and take situation, and you are doing all the giving and he is doing all the taking.
I would suggest that you walk.
I say this from someone who tried several diff. times, and ended up becoming very sick. I now have to deal with a very painful condition called Spasmodic Torticollus, and Osteoarthritis, and fibromyalgia, and depression and anxiety.
Is that enough??? I would think so..
Go now, before you loose the faith that you have. Find a man that is your equal. One that God recommends.
I bet you did not know when you married him, that you were to seek God... right?? most folks don't... and it would be a cruel God indeed, to hold one to that for a lifetime. In fact, it would be equal to trying to live the law... and everyone knows that we are not supposed to do that, so why do people want to tie unequally yoked people together... and try to make them be happy.
Most times, it will not happen, what will happen, is that you will eventually become sick in body and in spirit, and you will never make me believe that this is Gods will for you.
I would take the grace that God offers, and find the happiness that you deserve, and let him set home with his videos.
you know us very well. i made him delete the porn and he has admitted he had a problem with it. see when we first met i thought he was the perfect man for me. he was everything i looked for. the problem with that is what we want usually isnt what God wants. My husband told me he was not addicted to porn and he told me other things. he even went to church with me and seemed kind of nervous about it, so i thought "wow! a good man willing to go to church with me!" and now, he doesnt want to go, he really doesnt care about hearing the word, so i have given up on talking to him about it. He has been through a lot in his life and he thinks that God must hate him, and i tell him that He loves you and its the devil that hates you. i also tell him that sometimes God puts things in your life so that you may turn to him and he really doesnt want to hear anything. He can be very selfish and i find myself asking why i even got married to the man. i just dont know. I talked to God tonight and i told Him that i would let Him take over cuz i sure cant do it. then this sense of peace came over me and its been good. i just need the Lords strength and i pray that things will work out in His will. thank you for the advice, im glad you know what i am going through! God bless you!!
I am so blessed to read your comments young sister. You hold on to God and you believe in His goodness and stand in His word. His word does not comeback void. You married this man now blow his mind up with Love.
You will not be able to do it without the living word in you richly, so dive into the word and surround your life with Godly radio, TV and church programs as well.
Let the Lord reign in your life and as you delight in His word, in His ways, He will give you the desires of your heart. That can be in weeks, months or years, but it will happen and it is dependent on our personal relationship with Him.
Keep your faith in the Lord and never lose your trust in Him.
I know there is no problem which is greater than Him.
I will never forget you in my prayers and I know your problems would be solved in God's own time.