All About GOD - Growing Relationships with Jesus and Others
Are divorce men and women permitted to marry again?
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Amanda on
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There is forgiveness for all sins. If someone's divorce was sinful, the person must not try to justify it with reasons why he/she divorced but must accept resonsibility for it and confess it and seek forgiveness from God and from the hurt spouse (does not mean reconciliation must or even can happen). If the divorce occurred when the person was not saved, then once the person was born again, the slate was wiped clean and the person became a new creation. The old is gone, the new has come. Getting married again in that case, I don't see any sin in it.
God hates divorce. The sin of adultery appears to free the other marriage partner but there is also forgivness. If the offending spouse is sorry and repentant and desires not to end the marriage, the offended spouse should forgive even though they may have the "right" to leave the marriage.
One mistake people make is leaving immediately out of hurt and anger and not waiting until they are able to make the decision when they are calmer and more able to deal with it emotionally. We need to be mature enough to recognize that life is not always all about us and what feels good for us in the moment. I heard someone say, If you are married and have children, you have an obligation and a commitment that far transcends what feels good. (It may have been Dr. Phil, Lol)
But your question is, Is it OK to marry someone who is divorced? If they are a believer and if they have been forgiven for the divorce. No one can say I am divorced but the divorce was not my fault. There are always two sides. When any relationship fails, both people bear a certain percentage of responsibility for it, which could be 50/50, 80/20, or even 99/01, but I think you can see my point.
An example: If you have an affair with a married man and he decides to leave his wife for you, he has sinned and you have sinned. If you marry him, it is sin. If you truly repent, you will be forgiven. It does not mean that your marriage should end, for you have made a covenant with him in marriage and leaving that marriage would be a sin, too IMO.
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Permalink Reply by Ricprimus on
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Nice reply as always Amanda; I was married in the Catholic church in 1981, when things went very bad a year and half later (spouse's weekend encounter with old boyfriend that led to pregnancy (severe depression over the problems over my sons birth), I was (besides the ordinary civil divorce) allowed by the church to either have the marriage annuled or to have a divorce. Annulment would have had the effect of the marrige never having occured in the eyes of the church, with the result of my son being considered a bastard (with ecclesiastical ramifications for him), so I opted for a Writ of Dissolution that acknowledged that the marriage had occured and my son was born under it's sacrament, but was no longer valid from the occurrance of the adultery. As to the repentance/forgiveness side, I would have continued in the marriage and considered her future daughter my own, but she was very much a feminist and decided she wanted the freedom to choose random partners. A very rough time in my life, with a lot of soul-searching and prayer.
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Permalink Reply by Tammy on
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My heart broke as I read this testimony Ricprimus. I'm so sorry you went thru that pain.
What also stood out to me as I was reading this, it breaks my heart the amount of leverage any person allows a "religion" - Catholics - to place on their lives. For centuries the Catholics have deceived the people & to still hear that there are so many who still believe it's deceptions are heart breaking. No man will ever control my life nor do they have any kind of authority over my destiny. That's really all I'm going to say about it on this reply because I was so touched by your situation that I didn't want to pull away from that too much. Be blessed brother.
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I do not fault the Catholic doctrine in trying to deal with the very serious issue of divorce, the varieties of religion through out time have all devised guidelines, rules, laws in dealing with a most serious issue ranging from "death to the offender", to the more modern "la, la, let's host a divorce party and let bygones be bygones". A primary issue (besides the individual moral issue) is to provide for the welfare of children involved and maintaining their status in the society. The marriage itself was no great loss, since it was born in sin (she was essentially my mistress for nearly a year and we married when she was roughly 7 months pregnant with Paul); there was a great deal of sin and fault on my part in even involving, let along committing myself to such an obvious mismatch. God salvaged something of it, in my grief I commenced an exhaustive study in the history of the Bible and art of The Book. And it brought my streak of having art groupies/mistresses' to an end (lol, at least for 17 years). One does not have to be crazy to be an artist, but it does help.
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Ah, Rick. I appreciate your honesty and straightforwardness. There is no sense in sugarcoating sin or seeking to justify it. Just own it, ask forgiveness, and for strength to be faithful to God. As always, there are consequences, and sometimes those are very severe. We learn from our sins and our mistakes. Thankfully, God is merciful and longsuffering and willing to forgive us and leads us into true repentance.
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OOOOOHHHHH. I see now. I didn't read it right the first go around. I thought she had ran around on you, got pregnant possibly by someone else, etc. LOL. Boy did I have that one wrong. lol.
I'm actually not sure of any religion that is lala divorce party except maybe Scientology or Hollywoodology. Sorry for the misunderstanding brother. I will say the Catholics do have that one correct as far as divorce goes. It's about the only thing they have right.
And I LOVE your art. I think I've already shared that with you. I can't wait until you post more like you promised me. I'm into the drawings. And being crazy does help a little. Being an artist always helps on the figure too - starving artist.
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No you read it right, my son was conceived out of wedlock; her daughter was conceived in wedlock, just not to her husband, me (just a single one night thing). A sign of the times: Hallmark has a line of "just divorced greeting cards". It is one of thee ways Satan and her secular helpers win, trivialize what is holy. Anyway, quite enough for me on this topic, one of the great disasters of my life and one of the great didsasters in modern cultures.
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Wow. Sounds like an American soap opera.
That's crazy about Hallmark cards. When I was young, we were taught to fight for our marriages not only because we were Christians but just for the sake of moralities & the children. Now just a little irreconcilable difference, we'll call it quits.
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